Andrew Cashner: "The Silva Lining" for the Chicago Cubs 2011 Pitching Rotation

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Andrew Cashner:
Ezra Shaw/Getty Images
Chicago Cubs RHP, Andrew Cashner

I had previously thought that Cubs manager Mike Quade didn't possess a "mean streak."

I'm not talking like a Chris Brown/Mel Gibson anti-Semitic streak. Hell, I'm not even talking about the visible anger shown by the young, African-American couple in the State Farm commercial.

I literally thought the "Q-Ball" didn't release his tension on water coolers or overweight Hispanic starters, but Carlos Silva trashed Quade's staff and got shipped out of town faster than a Jansport knapsack full of hate mail.

With Silva gone, the Cubs have now freed themselves of all remnants of the Milton Bradley fiasco. In hindsight, if the Rangers sent the carcass of the Maine-born American game pioneer who died in 1911 in their trade to the Cubs instead of the volatile, hot-tempered outfielder who would go on to hit .257 with 12 homers and proceed to blame the city, it would've worked out much better.

Then, as if Bradley's presence didn't already hamper the team like rheumatoid arthritis in 2009, they swapped him for a supposed baseball reincarnation of Gabriel Iglesias in 2010.

Like Toby Keith says, "Freedom don't come free."

At first, Silva was great. He was the "silver lining" to the Cubs' horrendous first half. Little did we know his cholesterol levels were at the same height as Ethan Suplee (pre-weight-loss) and he could only muster 11.2 innings of work after the All-Star break (with an 11.12 ERA and a .426 OBA).

So, when Andrew Cashner outpitched Silva in spring training, you knew there would be tension between Riggins and the Silva Fox.

"Sometimes you just have to cut a man loose." -  Gary Bertier, Remember the Titans.

In walks 6'6'', 200-lb. Andrew Cashner.

First of all, do you have any idea how skinny that is? It's going to be all knees and elbows flying toward the plate when No. 48 toes the rubber.

At least it will make us forget having to stare at Silva's frame for three-plus hours in the summer sun sweating like Adam Richman from Man vs. Food.

Still, even though Cashner is right-handed (the Cubs have five RHP starters) and has a grungy ginger beard that resembles Sheamus from the WWE, I'd rather have him out there than Silva.

It's always a different approach for a pitcher when he's in it from Opening Day. So, enjoy your first four days off in the bullpen, sign some autographs and never use plastic in the 312.

Straight Cash-ner, homie

 

Read more from Chicago Sports Noise @ www.chicagosportsnoise.com or follow him on Twitter @FrostyAustin

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