John Cena, WWE and Internet Wrestling Community: A Hidden Love Story Uncovered

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John Cena, WWE and Internet Wrestling Community: A Hidden Love Story Uncovered

For those who are new, Internet Wrestling Community or, as it is fondly called, IWC, is not a bunch of people who wrestle online (though we do). It is, rather, a bunch of people who know more about wrestling than Vince McMahon (though we don’t).

A general perception is that the IWC hates John Cena. Usually, we write hate mail to Cena and address it to each other to strengthen our brotherhood.

However, a WWE/TNA Mark Madness organized by our fellow Featured Columnist Mr. Big Nasty has revealed the sweet tooth of this sour community. IWC’s soft spot for John Cena has been exposed to the world in a very wardrobe malfunction-esque manner.

John Cena has entered the final round of the tourney by defeating John Morrison, Alberto Del Rio, Kurt Angle and The Undertaker in a row. This is shocking, given IWC’s love for those four men.

Therefore, this result has finally brought forth the two untold love stories of the wrestling world. The first is a saga of IWC’s closet love for John Cena and second is a subliminal romance of WWE and IWC.

Disclaimer: This article does not mean to criticise any living, non living, actual or virtual entity. Secondly, this article is almost serious.

 

I hate to love you, but I do...

There are always a few girls who think they are far more intelligent than their fraternity. They insist that they can never fall for a man en vogue. Their choices are supposedly classy and different.

They often fall for a guy with an unkempt beard, arrogant manners and pretentious knowledge. According to them, the best date revolves around spiritual intimacy.

However, the hidden drawer of their closets guards their heinous secrets. It might have a love letter written to their first crush. Had he not rejected them, they would not have been sadistic and sardonic.

The Internet Wrestling Community is one such girl. Her preferences are, many times, obnoxious. Her cynical passion is well accompanied by snobbish stock of knowledge.

IWC stands for pure skills and not for generic masses of flesh that move around. Kurt Angle, Ric Flair, HBK, CM Punk, Randy Orton (when he was a heel), John Morrison, et al., have been IWC’s favourite. IWC takes these names as many times as possible just to ascertain its virginity.

However, there is one name that is heard with every pulse of IWC. It is John Cena. There are always hundred of comments, which go like “If Cena wins I riot,” "Cena sux (that is how it is spelled),” “Cena has only five moves” and with their individual variations. But for all its hate, IWC can’t stop thinking about Cena.

In the poll, Cena has won each and every time. Out of more than 20,000, he had more than 11,000 people voting for him. That is enough to prove that a large chunk of IWC likes him more than JoMo, Angle, Del Rio and Taker. Had he faced lesser competition, he would have had more than 15,000 votes.

Wise men had said it before that hate is another side of love. This result of WWE/TNA Mark Madness testifies their wisdom. It has now been proved that IWC very secretively, guiltily and yet with burning passion loves John Cena.

Those, who write tirade against Cena, do that half of the times for redemption. They like him but feel ashamed of their infidelity. They feel that they are cheating on their heavenly bond with snobbery, about which this world could care less.

I just hope that someday, this love would find its justice and meet its destiny. And that day is not too far. In just less than two days, IWC would have voted John Cena as her champion.

 

I hate you, but can’t live without you

There has been a side story to this poll so far. As it has come out, WWE is very much aware of Internet’s choices.

As much as Michael Cole keeps deriding the Internet community, it is yet evident that they care about IWC. WWE may not like the ranting of IWC, but realizes that few points IWC makes are pertinent.

A very simple indicator of this truth again is this poll.

Cena, Orton, Edge, Miz and the Undertaker were the WWE superstars from the last eight. It is far from a coincidence that they are heavily pushed and marketed by WWE as well. WWE knows what it is doing and IWC can keep whining, but it is exactly what it wants too.

This is WWE’s side, but on the other hand, IWC is no different.

Out of last four competitors, three belonged to the evil empire of WWE. IWC is always clamouring for giving competition a chance, cutting TNA some slack. Where exactly did this chivalry go while making actual choices? Why did IWC not choose talented TNA wrestlers over worn-out WWE stars?

The answer is simple. WWE and IWC are interdependent. Without IWC, WWE is fractionally handicapped. Without WWE, there is virtually no IWC. We can refute this truth for eons to come, but it is not going to change.

 

Moral of the story

Well, I know it was not exactly a story, but this poll has been an interesting eye-opener. The WWE hate and Cena hate is looking to be deceptive now.

There is no need to change, though. That poll is not really any gospel, so relax. It is fun, the way it is.

P.S. I twice voted for Cena—A proud member of IWC.

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