The Ryder Cup begins tomorrow at Valhalla Golf Club in Louisville, Ky.
Valhalla was designed by Jack Nicklaus and named for a mythological, majestic, enormous hall ruled over by the god Odin. Chosen by Odin, those that die in combat travel to Valhalla upon death, led by Valkyries. There, they join the masses of the dead who have died in combat and I don't care.
Tiger isn't playing, so there will be a big asterisk engraved into the Cup if the Europeans win anyway.
The U.S. team is full of very content multi-millionaires with beautiful families who fly around the world in their private jets playing golf while someone carries their bag and holds an umbrella for them on rainy days.
I can really identify with this struggle, can't you?
I mean what's the point, really? Why is winning a silly team golf event so important? Is it some sort of overly competitive bully mentality of narrow-minded American sports fans who were raised watching the low-brow brutality of football instead of the finesse and strategy of soccer?
I like Europe and the people who call it home. Why would I want them to lose? Nick Faldo and his players are only defending what is rightfully theirs.
I'm sure they would rather not have to protect their property from pillaging Americans, but this is a fight they just can't run from.
The media has tried now for many years to trump up some sort of nationalistic pride in this ridiculous competition. Americans have none, since George Bush started that illegal war, and the Europeans are all from different countries, so who exactly can we defend the flag against?
- B/R Ticket Guide
What unifies the European Ryder Cup team is a disdain for Americans.
The problem is that we, the U.S. Americans, generally dislike ourselves.
What is there to like? We use an imbalanced amount of the world's natural resources while children in Third World countries die from mosquitoes carrying malaria. The arrogant leaders of our egocentric nation often abuse smaller nations with military threats and covert CIA operations.
There really is nothing that makes me want to win this competition. Phil Mickelson is a fat, lazy underachiever like most Americans and Kenny Perry is an old, white, southern redneck who dresses funny. I wish they weren't on my team, but like electing Dick Cheney, we made our beds and now we have to sleep in them.
The U.S. Team has a guy named Boo and a few other overgrown country club kids who probably drove a Porsche in high-school and occasionally popped the collar of their Polo shirt while walking the halls.
Even Anthony Kim has a bit of a Southern California accent. Justin and Hunter are not really guys you can see fighting for anything. Suing yes, fighting no.
None of these one-dimensional personalities would have the culture or creativity to design his own clothing line like Ian Poulter does. Diversification of interest is a sign of intelligence. I really love that the Europeans can become a cohesive team regardless of their different cultures and diverse lifestyles.
I welcome another U.S. loss, because there is nothing for me to be proud of as a citizen of the U.S. Compared to enlightened European thought, our country is bass-ackwards and unsophisticated. Nobody here even recognizes the beauty of soccer.
NASCAR fans don't even realize trained monkeys could drive a car in a constant left turn. It's a complete joke compared to the Formula 1 skill set.
Home foreclosures, the mortgage meltdown and racist election politics have me wishing I lived somewhere where people have a little more respect multiculturalism and an appreciation for the inherent travesty of the human condition.
I propose that we not keep score at all. Captain Azinger, have a little sensitivity and shake Captain Faldo's hand in forfeiture now. The last thing we need is more hostility and anger from undereducated southern rednecks in Kentucky directed across the Atlantic.
In some cultures, the humiliation of a public defeat can justify invasion. The blood of our troops will be on your hands if the U.S. wins.
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2 months ago
Thanks J.M. you just pumped me up for the ryder cup. USA USA USA USA USA (beat the painted on pants off of those Euro aholes.)
from 2 months ago
American swine.
2 months ago
J.M. wrote: "The problem is that we, the U.S. Americans, generally dislike ourselves."
lol...perhaps you should speak for yourself, you self-despising wanker. Never have I ever read a screed that reeked of such pathetic self-loathing. Then again, self-hatred is par for the course (pun intended) for liberals.
J.M. continues: "....wishing I lived somewhere where people have a little more respect [and] multiculturalism."
Who's stopping you from moving? Pack up your tie-dyed shirts and backpack and leave, kid. I highly doubt anyone will miss you.
Oh and btw, how'd that U.S. Ryder Cup victory taste?
2 months ago
Arrogant redneck.
from 2 months ago
You didn't answer my question: How'd the U.S. victory taste today? More than a bit bitter, I suspect. Better get used to the feeling -- McCain is going to kick Obama's skinny, terrorist-loving, tax-hiking, abortion-advocating ass this Nov. 4, and the Democrat party will self-destruct soon afterward. Perfect ending to a darn-good year.
2 months ago
The idiocy expressed in this column was (seemingly) endless, but let's address a couple issues:
Matthew writes: "The U.S. team is full of very content multi-millionaires with beautiful families who fly around the world in their private jets playing golf while someone carries their bag and holds an umbrella for them on rainy days."
Response: First of all, envy is an ugly thing -- check it at the door, Matt. If you had the talent these guys possess you'd be jet-setting and strutting around with a beautiful wife in a milisecond. Secondly, the European players have the same jets and same beautiful wives, so don't pretend as if this is purely an American phenomenon.
Matthew writes: "Why is winning a silly team golf event so important? Is it some sort of overly competitive bully mentality of narrow-minded American sports fans who were raised watching the low-brow brutality of football instead of the finesse and strategy of soccer?"
Response: This comment by Matthew was particularly stupid. ...even for him. The Europeans (both fans and players) want to win the Ryder Cup as fervently as the Americans. And if you've ever been to a soccer game you'd know that its fans are the most crazed on earth by a wide margin -- riots and drunkenness are commonplace. Hooliganism and soccer go hand in hand. So don't give me your "high brow, finesse" bullsh/t.
The remainder of your piece is just the usual fare of self-hatred and knee-jerk anti-Americanism. Gets boring after a while, actually.
You'd be doing us ALL a favor if you just packed up and left our country. ...and take as many of your comrades with you as possible. But alas, I'm afraid that's just wishful thinking. You have neither the guts nor the initiative to do so.
from 2 months ago
This last post was meant to be addressed to J. Michael Morris, not Matthew.
from 2 months ago
Were you home schooled?
2 months ago
Hey Matthew! I am sure Boo would gladly put his driver up your ass to demonstrate some real AMERICAN patriotism. That is of course if Sarah Palin meets up with you sooner and shoots your wimpy liberal ass with her moose cannon! Your democrat leftist posterior would make a nice addition to her hunting trophies no doubt about it. I can only guess The Lord Messiah Barack HUSSEIN Obama is your "Mama" too? GO MCCAIN-PALIN!
2 months ago
EDIT... (Sorry Matthew my bad) J. Michael Morris! I am sure Boo would gladly put his driver up your ass to demonstrate some real AMERICAN patriotism. That is of course if Sarah Palin meets up with you sooner and shoots your wimpy liberal ass with her moose cannon! Your democrat leftist posterior would make a nice addition to her hunting trophies no doubt about it. I can only guess The Lord Messiah Barack HUSSEIN Obama is your "Mama" too? Oh, by the way those arrogant leaders you speak of our egocentric nation that was often abusing smaller nations with military threats and covert CIA operations where around during the CLINTON years you wack-job! I guess you probably believe we deserved the 911 attacks too right dickless? GO MCCAIN-PALIN 2008!
from 2 months ago
Marcus, just stick to reading the drudgereport.
2 months ago
Hey guys I think that J. Michael was trying to show why we should care so much about winning the RYDER CUP. He was very good at getting me to hate the EURO's. POULTER is going down next CUP. USA USA USA USA.
2 months ago
Watching Anthony Kim thoroughly kick Sergio’s posterior yesterday was the highlight of the tournament. ....along with watching Nick "The Prick" Faldo stammer, stutter, and attempt to hold back tears of grief and embarrassment in his post-tourney interview.
As far as the author is this piece of garbage of an article is concerned ....well, the punk isn't worth the bandwidth.
from 2 months ago
Why can't you replace your hate with love?
2 months ago
{ "Why can't you replace your hate with love?" }
Ok, punk. I'd LOVE to kick your commie ass?
Better?
from 2 months ago
kick? or kiss?
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