
PGA: Six Reasons the Tour Has Become Unwatchable (And One Reason It Hasn't)
Sorry, but the PGA tour has become all but unwatchable. The first three tournaments of the year were won by guys named Jonathan Byrd, Mark Wilson, and Jhonattan Vegas. Riveting stuff.
Bubba Watson and Phil Mickelson stepped it up at Torrey Pines (the Farmers Insurance Open to be official). But in the past 18 months the PGA tour has sunk lower than the Titanic.
Let's take a look at the reasons why.
We'll finish with a glimmer of hope.
6. The Season Is Too Long
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The PGA Tour should start at Bay Hill. Sure, the tournament in Scottsdale is the best party west of Mardi Gras, but January and early February are about football. As in, The Super Bowl. Throw in the fact that four of the first 11 PGA tournaments are played outside the continental U.S and you've got a viewer problem. I don't care that Cameron Beckman won last year's Mayakoba Golf Classic at Riviera Maya-Canun.
Mark Twain once said, "Let us live so that when we come to die, even the undertaker will be sorry." Don't think the undertaker would shed a tear for the Puerto Rico Open.
5. Who Are These Guys?
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These Guys are Good is all well and good if you know who these guys are.
First, I couldn't pick the no-name winners out of one-man lineups (someone named Derek Lamely won last year's Puerto Rico Open).
Second, even the so-called rising stars don't elicit much excitement. Still waiting for Camilo Villegas to do something besides wear tight shirts. Anthony Kim whooped up on Sergio in the Ryder Cup two years ago. Hasn't done much since. Hunter Mahan lost a huge Ryder Cup match in Wales. Couldn't tell how he felt behind those shades. And Dustin Johnson has made more news for his major meltdowns than anything else. Plus, he looks like Detective Quinn from Showtime's Dexter. I'd rather watch Dexter.
Imagine Villegas, Kim, Mahan, Johnson in the skins game. Big ratings.
4. Pace of Play
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One word: agonizing.
Yesterday Jhonattan Vegas couldn't pull a club slow enough yesterday. Even a 30 handicapper knows what he hits from 100 yards out. Not Vegas. Every shot was like 220 over water from a nasty lie in the rough with a 50 mph wind at his back.
The CBS guys couldn't cut in late enough. Just when it looked like Vegas was going to hit a shot, he'd back off and ask his caddie to reconfirm the yardage and then switch clubs and so on and so on. Guess that's what winning the Bob Hope does. Look, Vegas is obviously a good player. But if he'd had to go to the Porta-Potty during the round I wouldn't have been surprised to see his caddie hustle in after to check his wiping technique.
3. Technology
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Someone hit it in the rough!
I like watching Phil Mickelson because he bashes the ball all over the place. Great golf theatre was seeing him bounce his tee shot off the hospitality tent on the 18th at Winged Foot in 2006.
Sadly, technology has made these moments rare. It's just too easy for these guys to hit the ball straight. No wild tee shots, no threat of going in the water from 230 out. Par 5s that have been reduced to driver - 9 iron. Buried balls that rise from the rough like easy-bake cookies. For catastrophe to strike we need a mental melt down (DJ at U.S. Open) or a bizarre ruling (DJ at PGA). What ever happened to a good ole shank to keep things interesting?
It's hard to tell which pros are really good and which pros just look really good because they're using really good technology. I have no idea if Anthony Kim is a great golfer or a good golfer or a really good golfer. I did know, however, that Nick Faldo was a damn good golfer because he blistered the Old Course in 1990 with persimmon woods and irons with heads the size of quarters.
Speaking of Faldo, he pined for persimmon near the end of yesterday's round. I think his subtle plea fell on deaf ears. Bash it, find it, and bash it again is here to stay. Result: booooring.
2. Even The Commentators Are Bored
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Yesterday the normally chipper Jim Nance was more subdued than Nora Jones' music. The guy sounded like he was calling a high school cross country meet.
When the upcoming CBS golf schedule flashed on screen, Nance rattled off the tournaments like a shopping list. He barely managed to raise his voice an octave for The Masters. "A tournament unlike any other" sounded just like "Watson makes a nice two-footer for par."
Even the constantly entertaining David Feherty couldn't come up with any good jokes. I could sense he wanted to get himself to the nearest pub. And it was a decent tournament, with Phil trying to catch Watson on the last hole.
If you're having trouble sleeping, skip the Lunesta and play back yesterday's broadcast instead.
1. The Tiger Hangover
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Whether you're happy Tiger is struggling or not, it's hard to deny something isn't missing without him. Yes, the coverage of Tiger can be nauseating (particularly when he's not in contention), but he does deliver the goods.
Even some of his petulant tantrums might be a welcome relief from the muted robots we've now got roaming the fairways. If Tiger's going to remain AWOL, we need some guys with personality to step up and win not just a few standard tournaments but some majors as well.
Major winners since Tiger's 2008 U.S. Open victory: Padraig Harrington, Angel Cabrera, Lucas Glover, Stewart Cink, Phil Mickelson, Louis Oosthuizen, and Martin Kaymer. Aside from Phil, no one to jump off the couch about.
Either get it together Tiger, or please, someone step up to fill the void.
Someone like ................
BUBBA WATSON!
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Bubba Watson is the best thing going in golf.
First, he trumps the technology problem because the guy could hit it 350 with a chopstick. His swing is so powerful yet unorthodox he looked like he's going to strangle himself. With a extra long slice of pink licorice.
Second, he's having a blast out there. He acts like he truly appreciates how fortunate he is to be playing golf for a living. He blew off last year's PGA disappointment with the realization that he had made the Ryder Cup team. Even better!
Third, he shows his emotions. Not just on the course, but after, as evidenced by his press conference yesterday. He said he was "scared to death out there" and teared up when he talked about his dad. Sad, but a refreshing change.
Fourth, the dude's funny. After winning at Torrey Pines he said: "It showed I can do it. I've done it twice now. I'm only 50 behind Phil and about 80 behind Tiger. So they better watch out."
Or step aside.





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