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Friends, Phoenicians, Suns Fans, Lend Me Your Ears

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Friends, Phoenicians, Suns Fans, Lend Me Your Ears
Stephen Dunn/Getty Images

Friends, Phoenicians, Suns fans, lend me your ears;

I come to bury the Suns’ title-contending days, not to praise them.

The awful moves that team management commits live on after their tenure;

The good are often interred within their wallets;

So let it be with the Suns.

The noble Sarver hath told you that the Suns were contenders;

If it were so, it was a grievous fault,

And grievously, hath Steve Nash answered it.

Here, under leave of Sarver and the rest –

For Sarver is an honorable man;

So is all of management, all honorable men -

Come I to speak at the Suns’ season funeral.

They were my team, flawed and weak down low to me:

Christian Petersen/Getty Images
Et tu, Hedo?

But Sarver said they were contenders;

And Sarver is an honorable man.

Nash hath brought many fans home to U.S. Airways Center

Whose revenue did Sarver's coffers fill:

Did this in the Suns make contenders?

When that the fans have cried for wasted drafts and horrendous free agent signings, Nash hath wept:

Title contention should be made of sterner stuff:

Yet Sarver said they were contenders;

And Sarver is an honorable man.

You all did see the numerous draft nights

Where the team sold away their precious first-round draft picks,

Which Sarver did as the team decayed: was this the way to build a contender?

Yet Sarver said they were contenders;

And, sure, he is an honorable man.

I speak not to disprove what Sarver spoke,

For those unfamiliar with the source material, I give you Brando.

But here I am to speak what I do know.

You all did love the Suns once, not without cause:

What cause withholds you then, to mourn for them?

O judgment! Thou art fled to brutish beasts,

And men have lost their reason. Bear with me;

My heart is in the coffin there with the Suns,

And I must pause till 2011-12 comes around to me.


Be sure to follow me on Twitter @PHXSuns29 for the latest Suns insight from Bleacher Report

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