Returning to Fenway?

Bryan HealeyCorrespondent ISeptember 12, 2008

I've made an important decision in my life: I want the Dodgers to square off against the Red Sox in the World Series. Calm down LA, I don't want you to win. I just want you to go. In long-standing tradition with myself, I of course want the Red Sox to win. I just think it would be a lot of fun to see Nomar Garciaparra, Manny Ramirez, and Derek Lowe play in Fenway again.

In addition, I have yet to see Greg Maddux pitch live, which should be grounds for execution.

Finally, I think it would be exceptionally awesome to have Joe Torre get to a World Series this year. He was essentially embarrassed out of the Yankees organization by the Steinbrenner's because they felt he wasn't winning enough, which is lunacy in my opinion.

I think it would be just the right amount of vengeance for Torre to show up in the Fall Classic the very next season; a symbolic middle finger, if you will. I would be highly entertained watching young Hankie throw chairs out his office window.

I mean nothing personal by that, Yankee fans. Unlike some Sox fans, I don't revel in Yankee failures, but only in the success of the Sox. I just hate Hank Steinbrenner is all, much like Hitler only with less genocide and war. He's like a smaller, crazier, dumber version of his father on cocaine and horse steroids. I'm surprised he hasn't attempted to physically choke Alex Rodriguez to death.

Anyway, I think I would mostly anticipate Nomar's return to Fenway. I always felt bad for him. Here was a guy who was revered amongst Boston fans for years, touted as the second coming of Ted Williams (which always seemed a bit macabre, since Ted was still alive for a large portion of Nomar's tenure on the Sox).

He even had a cheesy playoff-only remake of "Mambo #5" made in his honor. From 1996 to 2000, his batting average went steadily upward every year. He went from .241 to .306 to .323 to .357 to .372. Based on this trend, I could, at age 16, extrapolate that Nomar would be hitting over .500 by the time he was ready to retire.

The year 2000 was the most fun for me personally. I know I am alone amongst Sox fans in that opinion because they missed the playoffs, but I don't care. That year was the best: Pedro had the greatest single season of a pitcher ever. Carl Everett hit 34 home runs and went insane, which is always entertaining.

In addition, Nomar flirted with, and often surpassed, .400 all season, finishing with .372 and hit 51 doubles. For a statistic junkie like myself, 2000 was a lot of fun. After that year, though, it all went downhill for Nomar. He would never again get above .321 for a season, and was consistently closer to .300.

In a few short seasons, Nomar went from a Fenway god to unwanted drek. When he was traded away in 2004, his departure was actually cheered amongst fans. Therefore, I think it would be fitting for him to return to Fenway in the spotlight of a World Series playoff run. Good for him! Of course, I also hope we then proceed to crush his team like a bug under a steamroller... But still...

As for Manny... Well, I just want him to come back so I can watch him get booed and spit on. Moreover, maybe spike himself running to first base. There's also always the chance he'll get all confused and try to hit clean up for the Sox. That would certainly be entertaining.

I think an LA-Boston series would be a lot of fun, even in spite of the very real risk of death from having to watch west coast game until very early in the morning and then going to work shortly after. However, those are the risks you take, as a baseball fan, and it will all have been worth it provided LA doesn't go and do anything stupid, like beat the Sox.

So bring on Nomar, Manny, Lowe and Torre! Fenway is ready!