Happy new year....
This past year, I turned 40. Yes, I'm officially over the hill.
It's time for me to seriously make a New Year's resolution. I promise that I will...
NEVER TELL THE TRUTH!!! I'm sick of telling the truth.
I'm tired of telling everyone that Denard Robinson alone can't save Rich Rodriguez. I'm tired of having my article being pulled because I paid homage to Pat Tillman's dying wish. I'm tired of being criticized for suggesting that Bob Costas has a double-standard when it comes to comparing the achievements of black athletes to that of white athletes.
Most important, I'm tired of telling the Detroit Lions that their drafting and contract negotiation skills both suck.
Instead, I chose to use this year to lie.
No, this year Michael "Dog-killer" Vick won't be the NFL's MVP.
No, the Detroit Red Wings won't face the Philadelphia Flyers in the Stanley Cup finals.
No, Tiger Woods won't win a major this year.
Yes, "Snookie" will quit going to a tanning salon.
No, Brett Farve won't retire.
Yes, the Detroit Lions will extend Matthew Stafford's contract.
No, there is a Santa Claus.
I could go on and on with this, but let's be honest. When you'd signed onto this forum, you were looking for honest and open-minded opinions concerning your favorite team and sport, not lies and deceptions. Sorry, but I can't do that. That would be a defeat for the first amendment.
Now, for my REAL New Year's resolution.
I'm going to let my emotions get the best of me and REALLY TELL THE TRUTH!!!
As I look back at my past responses, I'd felt a sense of unresolved anger within myself. But then a miracle happened; somebody contacted me over the net in a manner that ticked me off. So I blew up and it felt good. I had enough of people telling me what I can and cannot say simply because THEY CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!
I feel bigger, stronger, faster and healthier now that I relieved myself of the burden of trying to please everyone. The fact of the matter is that there are people out there that enjoy being miserable; why not give them my company by telling them the truth.
So give me your misery. Show me you hate me for saying that Rich Rodriguez is out at Michigan. Show me the hate when I tell Bob Costas to join the rest of us in the 21st century. Show me your rage when I say that morality has NO place in any sports Hall of Fame balloting.
But whatever you do, don't tell me to lie. Yes, it would be easy for me to NOT say that Justin Beiber is the daughter I'd always wanted and that the Big Ten had played well this year in football. You want me on that wall, you need me on that wall!
So sit back a relax when you're reading my articles; if you hate my articles, you can always find a writer that will write the article, that has the opinion you'd always wanted to hear.
Thanks for your attention.
BTW: Oregon 38, Auburn 24
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