The Battle of the Cam Newton Songs

Stan SillimanCorrespondent IINovember 20, 2010

The Battle of the Cam Newton Songs

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    Al Messerschmidt/Getty Images

    I'm calling it right now. Here it is: Cam Newton is the most spectacular one-and-done, polarizing football phenom to ever burst on the college scene.

    Yes, there were other more exciting players, but they weren't one-and-done and didn't come surrounded by so much controversy.

    Plus, they weren't bigger-than-life (unless your life exceeds 6'6", 250 lbs) and didn't have that smile that goes on for miles.

    Heisman Trophy candidate Cam Newton is the kind of kid his daddy might think is worth $180,000 or so. At least a dad might inquire if he's worth that much.

    Cam Newton is the kind of player fans wet their pants over. Depends should sponsor Cam Newton.

    Cam Newton inspires songwriters to write songs about him—some fawning, some sappy, some rappy and some parodic.

    That's where we come in. Silliman on Sports has collected these songs for you, sports fans, and we've arranged them in order for your viewing and listening pleasure. 

    All for the unheard-of low price of $0.00.

    But wait, if you order today, you'll get comments about these songs from Stan Silliman for only an additional $0.00.

    But wait, if you order today...ah, forget it... just watch the slideshow.

50 Ways To Win the Heisman

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    Cam is featured in a parody of one of my favorite Paul Simon songs, "50 Ways to Leave Your Lover."

    Mr. Big Foot here doesn't have a bad voice. I'll give him that. He looks like he fell off a ZZ Top hot rod. He could have used a better T-shirt.

    Does Paul Simon deserve this? Yes, it's punishment for his Broadway musical The Capeman.

Cam for Heisman: A Rap Song

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    He jukes to the left, he jukes to the right

    Next thing you know Cam is outta sight

    It's war, war, Cam, Cam, Eagle

    by a guy tagged MAUR33.

    This is the BEST RAP SONG ever written about a one-and-done, multi-talented QB.

Cam Newton for Heisman 2010

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    Cam, Cam, what a man

    No. 2 on his Jersey, No. 1 on your minds

    He's gonna beat ya every single time

    If you heard you could stop him

    Then you just misunderstood

    by Auburn Jac.

    This is the BEST ACOUSTIC SONG ever written about a one-and-done, multi-talented, controversial QB.

Another Rap? Do tha Heisman on that Ho?

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    If I missed the lyrics, I apologize.

    But I think they're saying, "Do Tha Heisman on Dat Ho."

    I could be wrong. It could be "Do the Heisman you deserve?" or maybe "Do tha Heisman like a Pro?"

    Are they referring to Reggie Bush, who was a pro when he was in college?

    Help me out on this one, folks.

Heisman Hype Set to Music (Game Action Videos)

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    OK, these are not new songs. Just music set to clips.

    But they're good clips. Vince Youngish-type clips.

    More original music still to come

Moonpie's Son of a Preacher Man

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    Now we get down to the controversy.

    Cam's daddy is a preacher who had a church in need of repairs. The church got the money for repairs not long after Cam joined Auburn.

    Coincidence? Probably. But maybe enough to inspire another song.

    Keep going and there will be enough for a "Songs Inspired by Cam Newton" album.

    This next one is by Moonpie, who I suspect is not an Auburn fan.