With all the self help books out there and Handy man web sites I decided that Bleacherreport.com needed someone to step up and give people a step by step guide to all things related to sports. I would love to make this a weekly thing but that all depends on how you, the readers, like it.
So with out further ramblings, here is the 1st (and maybe last) How to Helper.
How to throw the greatest college football party ever.
Supplies
Fans, members of the opposite sex, rival fan, food, drinks, soft objects, and a TV.
Playbook.
1. Pick a game against your teams rival. Picking a game against a cupcake or twinkie team will not have the same effect. You need a big game. UofM vs. OSU, FL vs FSU, or something along those lines. (LSU vs. App. St does not count.)
2. Find a spot that you don't mind getting dirty. This place should be able to withstand the grossest of things. Puke, blood, and bodily fluids may end up on the wall before this night is done. (That room in your mom's house that you are not allowed in should not be used.) The best place is typically a garage or unfinished basement.
3. Get food catered in. Do you really want to be the one sitting outside grilling burgers while your team makes an amazing play? I didn't think so. It is much better to pay Yesterdog or Chilis to make the food and clean up the mess.
4. Buy a keg. Trust me, this is a must.
5. Invite a single opposing teams fan over. It is much more fun if you can mock, taunt, and harass someone who roots for the other team. Plus if there is only one of them then most likely you and the rest of the people there can take him or her (Yes it can be a her, but only if she is a die hard fan.)
6. Drink. Ah the joy of having a beer or ten while watching a game.
7. Eat until you almost puke. You paid for the food, get the most out of it. A bonus to this is that you can drink more without making an jackass of yourself.
8. Watch game. This part is important, as that is the main reason for throwing the party.
9. Hug anyone wearing your teams colors after a big play. If you are not comfortable doing this repeat step 6.
10. Dump a bag of chips or throw random soft objects at opposing teams fan when his/her team makes a good play. Hard objects are not good to throw as a trip to the hospital is not the desired result of the party. If you are uncomfortable doing this repeat step 6.
**Caution**
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