As of right now, college football has not started yet, and therefore we are in the waning moments of a hope-filled season. It is the time of year when everyone's team is undefeated, and they all have a chance. Some of those hopes and dreams are unrealistic, but we have them nonetheless.
So before most of our dreams are destroyed by reality, let's take a little time out to hope. Like Andy Dufresne said, "Hope is a good thing—maybe the best of things."
I have listed 25 things I hope for this upcoming season. It is loosely based on the top 25 rankings. If I don't mention your team, don't hate because I said LOOSELY.
As many of you know, I am a huge Longhorn fan, but in the interest of solidarity or unbiased...ness (?) or something, I'll try to keep that out of the top 25.
However, you know I can't write an article and not talk some Longhorn football, so soon to follow this article will be another about the top 10 things I hope for the Longhorns this season.
Enjoy.
1. I hope UGA does not make the BCS title game. I never really liked the Dawgs, and now that I live here in Atlanta, I like them even less. Now I know a lot of grads and I'm actually dating one, so it's not a personal thing—I just don't like them. It's my list! Feel free to comment or come back with your own.
2. I hope that somehow the Buckeyes redeem themselves without winning the National Championship. They have enough of them and are super cocky, but man they have a received a lot of crap from everyone.
3. I hope that Mark Sanchez is the real deal (he seems like a really good kid), but that USC loses to Stanford AGAIN! Wouldn't that be so fun, and such a head scratcher? Maybe a loss to UCLA would be cool too.
4. I hope that the Chokelahoma Sooners lose every single game they participate in. I hope they somehow lose practices too! I hope that Sam Bradford rebounds with THE WORST QB efficiency rating ever.
I hope that the entire Oklahoma Sooner athletic department is involved in a scandal of epic proportions that involves cheating (naturally), gambling, inbreeding, and beastiality. The NCAA would be forced to hand out the death penalty, but due to its hypocritical nature could not enforce it for very long. However, all sports teams would be dismantled and the athletic director sent to prison.
In an extremely ironic turn of events, Oklahoma would turn to the last football player to not actually be convicted of a crime while wearing an OU uniform. That's right—Josh Jarboe will become the new AD. He would then establish "Lollipop" by Lil' Wayne as the new fight song and hire his posse as "consultants."
The chants of 80,000 rednecks singing about licking a (w)rapper would fill the air in Norman, Oklahoma on every Saturday afternoon in the fall. A boy can dream, can't he?
5. I hope Florida





36 comments Last one added 10 months ago — Leave a Comment
Justin Goar 10 months ago
"I wish I could tell you that Michael fought the good fight, and the Sooners let him be. I wish I could tell you that - but the Red River Rivalry is no fairy-tale world."
funny read michael, right up my alley. although i wish you could've conveyed your feelings about the sooners in more detail. i was having trouble grasping your stance.
and don't worry. i'll make sure one of the bouncers puts you on the list.
Edit Comment Cancel
Michael Bergman 10 months ago
What/Where/Who is that quote from?
Edit Comment Cancel
Justin Goar 10 months ago
the same movie your pic and intro to your article is from. i just substituted your name for "Andy" and "Sooners" for "Sisters".
Edit Comment Cancel
Michael Bergman 10 months ago
hahaha, totally. I didn't realize that at first. pretty brilliant. you're a good guy.
Edit Comment Cancel
Michael Bergman 10 months ago
hahaha, totally. I didn't realize that at first. pretty brilliant. you're a good guy.
Edit Comment Cancel
Michael Bergman 10 months ago
hahaha, totally. I didn't realize that at first. pretty brilliant. you're a good guy.
Edit Comment Cancel
Michael Bergman 10 months ago
hahaha, totally. I didn't realize that at first. pretty brilliant. you're a good guy.
Edit Comment Cancel
jackmartin martin 10 months ago
hi
i like your sites
jack martin
Ohio Alcohol Addiction Treatment
Edit Comment Cancel
Michael Bergman 10 months ago
thanks jack.
Edit Comment Cancel
Joseph Morgan 10 months ago
Funny stuff, Michael! I'll admit it, it would be strange to see Sooner fans in Norman singing along to "Lollipop," but I'm sure it would be most enjoyable for the Longhorn faithful as well as the rest of the nation. Haha. Well done!
Edit Comment Cancel
Michael Bergman 10 months ago
Thanks Joe!
Edit Comment Cancel
Michael Bergman 10 months ago
oops. sorry about the multiple comments, my computer freaked out.
Edit Comment Cancel
David Wunderlich 10 months ago
Texas without Oklahoma would be like the Joker without Batman. You can't kill them off, they're too much fun! They complete you in ways you'd probably never admit to.
Edit Comment Cancel
Michael Bergman 10 months ago
maybe. as long as Texas is Batman.
Edit Comment Cancel
BabyTate 10 months ago
This article has to be inspired by Obama.
I wonder if Obama pulls for Bama?
Great work on these 25, lot of thought and time. You need to enter the B/R challenge contest. Go to the front page and sign up. Be there!
Edit Comment Cancel
Michael Bergman 10 months ago
thanks for the love man. I'm actually Obama's speechwriter. shhhhh
Edit Comment Cancel
Kyle D 10 months ago
Wow, guess you don't like OU. It's gonna be tough for you when we completely own you again this year. Look for another 6 yrs of sad times in ole' Austin. We LOVE you coach Mac in Norman too! keep him forever and we will be fine with that. Boomer Sooner baby!
Edit Comment Cancel
Michael Bergman 10 months ago
Own us again huh? If you call a 7 point win "owning" then what would you call leading the all-time series by 17? That's a whole other level that you might have create a word for. I mean if 7 pts is owning, then 17 more years of dominance than another school is like something you probably can't even fathom. Nice work jack-@$$
Edit Comment Cancel
evan m 10 months ago
As a Texas fan, that was really entertaining to read. I definitely have a few different opinions about the rest of the conferences though. I'm tired of an unathletic and underprepared Buckeye team taking a more deserving team's spot in the national title game. On the other hand, I think UGA totally deserves to go for smacking down an uppity Hawaii last year and showing the importance of playing in a good conference with multiple big games.
And I want the Canes to be good again but not FSU.
And I will always smile when they say "The Juice is loose" no matter how overused it is.
Edit Comment Cancel
evan m 10 months ago
Oh and here is my hope for Lufkin. That a certain defensive tackle on their squad signs an LOI to play for UT.
Edit Comment Cancel
Michael Bergman 10 months ago
I don't know how much UGA deserves. I mean they were very good, but no one who gets creamed in a game and doesn't even go to their conference title game deserves to be in the NC game. But that was all last year, so we'll see.
Edit Comment Cancel
Michael Bergman 10 months ago
OH heck yeah for McFarland. I'm so worried because 2 years ago he was lock, stock and barrell for the Longhorns, not we're not so sure, although we still have a really good chance. I told my mom to persuade him every chance she gets, but knowing the idiots in my hometown he'll probably go to A&M and his talent will be wasted.
Edit Comment Cancel
Nathan Blunck 10 months ago
that's a good read man. keep up the good work, and join the contest, i'll be voting for you as often as i can.
Edit Comment Cancel
Michael Bergman 10 months ago
Thanks for the kind words. I think I'm entered in the contest. Maybe not. Plus don't you have to select me as pick of the day?
Edit Comment Cancel
Nathan Blunck 10 months ago
yup. this one was good, but i think since you don't bow down to the SEC you may be in trouble. we all know that their fans are the greatest.
Edit Comment Cancel
Dino 10 months ago
haha very nice my friend. very nice
Edit Comment Cancel
Michael Bergman 10 months ago
thanks for the love bro.
Edit Comment Cancel
Iceman 10 months ago
haha good read. I also think that Oklahoma could use a scandal or two. go ducks
Edit Comment Cancel
Michael Bergman 10 months ago
thanks buddy! any word on those shoes? JK, beat SC!!!
Edit Comment Cancel
Mitch at sportschatplace.com 10 months ago
Good read, as much as you like to trash my stuff I respect your opinion and that you're a straight shooter.
While I aprreciate youthoughts on Coach Shannon I'll take this moment to just say he has had success, 3 championship rings at 2 levels of football, that's about 3 more than most get to experience, not that there isn't room for more.
Edit Comment Cancel
Michael Bergman 10 months ago
Thanks man. Obviously I'm saying he deserves success as a coach too. He's trying to mold those guys into men, and not just players. So I hope he's successful in that at least.
Edit Comment Cancel
Dewd Iles 10 months ago
Hey Boogeyman! er, ah . . ., I mean Bergman, you've dun gone done'er now boy. You've pissed me off like the grand canyon's an erosion problem.
Never again are you to mention sacred words, like "Sooners" and "Dawgs" in your boring drivel.
Really, though, I should've known. "If it quacks like a duck and writes like a duck, it's a duck."
Btw, is it true that you have several Brown-Ringed gerbils in your harem?
Edit Comment Cancel
Michael Bergman 10 months ago
No, I'm a Longhorn, not a duck. Silly Dewd, drugs are for kids who already had brain cells.
Edit Comment Cancel
Kristofer Green 10 months ago
Ha! Funny. Love the Oklahoma rant. If only OSU could redeem themselves without winning the NC. I have a feeling they could blow everyone out during the regular season, win the NC by 50 and still people would find some reason why they didn't deserve it. But, what are you gonna do?
Great read!
Edit Comment Cancel
Kristofer Green 10 months ago
Love the Shawshank photo as well. Actually filmed in Ohio and parts were filmed just around the corner from the "Shoe".
Edit Comment Cancel
Michael Bergman 10 months ago
Really? Interesting stuff man. One of my all-time favorite movies.
Edit Comment Cancel
Leave a Comment
You must register to post a comment.