If I Hosted The ESPYS: My List Of Demands

ThomasSenior Writer IAugust 21, 2008

For some reason, ESPN Asia aired the 2008 ESPYS on TV yesterday.  Since I didn't see it the first time, I watched it.  As usual, it was a great show.  I think Justin Timberlake was a decent host.  He had good jokes and his little sports study was funny.  That's just my opinion though. 

Anyways, I thought to myself "If I ever got asked to host the ESPYS I would want some demands met."  Yes, my inspiration was Will Ferrell and John C. Riley, but hey, I can dream.


Demand No. 12:  I want my face on a Wheaties box.

Demand No. 11:  I want an ESPY award called "The Best Sports Blunder" where the best sports blooper or mistake is awarded.  I also want an award for the best sports movie of the year.

Demand No. 10:  I want Carrie Underwood as my co-host.

Demand No. 9:  I want Shoeless Joe Jackson inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame.

Demand No. 8:  I want NASA to send me to the moon so I can play golf.  Then I'll feel good about my swing and distance.

Demand No. 7:  I want Jesse Owens resurrected so he can race Usain Bolt and Michael Johnson.

Demand No. 6:  I want the Vince Lombardi Trophy to be renamed the Bill Belichick Trophy.

Demand No. 5:  I want to play tennis against Rafeal Nadal and win.

Demand No. 4:  I want the Olympic competing age lowered to 14.

Demand No. 3:  I want dodgeball to become an Olympic sport.

Demand No. 2:  I want my own weekly TV show on ESPN called Leemon's Weekly Sports Roast, where I can roast a coach, manager, or player each week.

Demand No. 1:  I want $20 million for life from ESPN so that my demands don't have to be met.


If anyone from ESPN reads this, I'm dead serious.  No not really :P.  It's only a dream.