Flip Saunders' Pre-Game Speech to the Detroit Pistons REVEALED! (Humor)

Here is my take of what Flip Saunders' pre-game speech is like:

[Saunders walks into the Pistons’ locker room giddy as an eight year old in a candy shop after the teams Game Two road win.]

Saunders: Guys!  We’ve done the impossible, WON ON THE ROAD…AGAINST THE CELTICS!!! Can you feel it?  Huh? Can ya? Just three more wins and we’re someplace you all have been and I have only dreamed about...The Finals.

[Saunders tilts his head and gazes into the light in a fixed daydream of whatever he thinks the Finals are.]

Billups: Uhhh, Coach?

Saunders: Oh—yes, Chauncey?

Billups: No, not you, Flip. I was talking to Curry—you know, the only person wearing a suit that I, along with the rest of the team, respect.

Wallace: Tru Dat!

Saunders: Oh, yea, my mistake.

Billups: Flip, I was Finals MVP and I want to save myself for the Finals, so I would appreciate it if instead of playing me when I'm needed this round, if you can sit me.  I know this goes against any coaching philosophy.

Saunders: But why?  We’re soo close.

Billups: Yeah, I know. But by you benching me, it will make it appear that it is your fault for me not playing, not mine for not wanting to risk personal injury and pain.  You understand, right?  I mean, you pretty much did the same thing with KG when you “coached” him.

Saunders: Uhhh, not really…

Billups: Thanks I knew you would understand.

Hamilton: Flip, you mind cleaning my protective mask? It’s getting foggy and kinda hard for me to see though.

Saunders: Uhh, that isn’t really my department.

McDyess: Oh, clean mine too

Saunders: [sighing] Fiiiiiine, whatever I have to do to keep my job.

(Saunders exits room with both protective masks and a towel)

Wallace: Great, now that he’s gone, I got this chronic from Josh Howard. Let's light this thing.

Hunter: Naw man, I got this great stuff from my wife that bulks you up, who wants some of this?

[Room is silent.]

Wallace: C’mon Theo, I know you light up.

Ratliff: Uh, no.

Wallace: Well, you had to be on something for you to make those comments about the Orlando series.  Next time, don’t have us cash the checks your mouth writes.

Ratliff: HEY! I lead the league in blocks….a decade ago.

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