With college football season literally weeks away from kicking off, we at Bleacher Report thought it would be a good idea to put together a preview of the season.
Unlike other previews, however, this one is different. It is everything your girlfriend or boyfriend who is otherwise clueless when it comes to college football needs to know to at least get by during the course of the season.
So while you are sitting on your sofa or in the stands yelling at people who can't hear or don't care what you are saying, your significant other can now follow along instead of playing with their cell phone the entire game.
While this list may not include every team you care about or every issue pertinent to college football, it at least touches on the things that always seem to matter year in and year out.
Caution: If you are not a complete dummy, have no sense of humor, or otherwise find your intelligence easily insulted, you may not want to read beyond this point. Of course you might, I can't stop you either way.