*No, Jonathan Lucroy did not write this. No, I'm not following the normal Bleacher Report short paragraphs and short sentences rule. I'm irregular. I'm unique. I'm revolting. Deal with it. Enjoy Mr. Lucroy's letter to the Brewers Nation and to the rest of the world.
Dear Brewers Fans,
Hello. Let me introduce myself. My name is Jonathan Charles Lucroy. I am from the beautiful city of Eustis, Florida and the Brewers management thinks I'm the future of the Brewers organization.
You may not know me very well, but that's okay. If Gregg Zaun had not gone down on the disabled list, there would be no doubt about it—nobody would know me. But, I'm here now. With all this talk about these fellows by the name of Strasburg and Heyward, nobody seems to be paying any attention to me. Why? I don't know. I have a better average than Squid-ward. Oops! I mean, Hey —ward. (.263 compared to Heyward's .251). Also, Lord knows that Stephen would be 6-0 if I was catching for him. But, hey whatever! I'm only the future !
I was selected in the third round (101st overall). It only took me three years to get up here. Don't get me wrong, it was tough. Well, okay, it was pretty easy for the future of the Milwaukee Brewers . I DID hit .342 with four homers and 39 RBI in the pioneer league in 2007. And all in all, in only three years, I racked up a batting average of .305 with 35 homers and 198 RBI in my minor league career. Not to mention my four MILB all-star selections in three years. But who cares? I'm only the future of Brew Crew baseball !
I know I'm the backup catcher, but once Ken Macha realizes that George Kottaras is playing like a piece of moldy bread (he's just hitting .209!), I'll prove myself.
And for all you critics out there who call my power "non-existent": who needs power? Rod Carew hit just 92 homers in his career, yet he compiled 3,053 hits, a career batting average of .328, and drove in a grand total of 1,015 runs. How about Honus Wagner? He hit "only" 101 home runs and he totaled 3,420 hits, drove in 1,733 runs, and had a lifetime batting average of .328! Guess where they are honored? Oh yeah, 25 Main Street in Cooperstown, New York. Otherwise known as the Baseball Hall of Fame!
I will not let the Brewers fans down. I will prove all you critics wrong. That's a promise.
Jonathan C. Lucroy
a.k.a. "The Future of Brewers Baseball"