Dodge This: Vickie Guerrero Gets a Dose Of Reality TV

Nadene DodgeCorrespondent IJuly 19, 2008

Friday finally came and I was excited to sit down and watch SmackDown!. I was looking forward to seeing Triple H, Jeff Hardy, Michelle McCool, Natalya, Big Show, and even Great Khali. Do you know what I had to see? Vickie Guerrero and Edge getting married. 

This is not what you want to see right after eating dinner!

As my stomach was doing the uncontrollable flip flops after seeing Vickie and Edge kiss, I sat there wondering, “WHO CARES”.  Do they really think that every fan wants to see them get married?


This wasn’t the only thing that ticked me off about the night. Finlay and Hornswoggle had a match with Ryder and Hawkins, and Edge was the guest referee.

This was only due to the fact that Edge told Finlay that they always cheat and he wasn’t letting them do it anymore. Then Edge interferes so Ryder and Hawkins win the match. What was that all about? 

Wasn’t Edge the cheater that time?

How about La Familia and their cheating? Is anyone going to stop them from doing it? There's NO WAY that La Familia knows how to win, unless they cheat.

I was looking forward to having commercials so that I could get a break from seeing the “happy couple” (heaving in trash). A Slim Jim commercial came on and here is Edge, with his spicy side, and it explains a lot about him. Is it the spicy side that is always on SmackDown! and we have yet to see the real Edge? 

Just makes you really think, now doesn’t it?

Then there was Vickie in the middle of the ring, wanting to get everyone’s attention just so that she can through the bouquet. Who Cares???!!!

When Michelle McCool came out and started pounding on Natalya, I thought, "Oh yeah, here we go. This is getting interesting." But NO, Vickie had Michelle escorted out. Isn’t this a wrestling show? 

To top that one, Vickie announces to Cherry, who caught the bouquet, that her prize is that she can wrestle Vickie. Then she changes that Cherry has to wrestle Natalya first.

Of course, all the women are in dresses and put in a match right then. Cherry didn’t have a chance, Vickie only wanted to be able to pin someone, and she didn’t want to have to work for it. LAZY BITCH!

I say if you want to get in the ring, you better be put to work. 

Wasn’t it last week that Vickie told everyone that she is permanently in the wheel chair, and that she can’t walk around ever again? Where is the wheelchair Vickie?

Yea, you are really hurt. I could tell when you were dancing with Edge, walking down the isle, and climbing in the ring for a match. 

By the way, you forgot the wheelchair, you big-ass fraud! Sorry, but this is just something that I have to get off of my chest! 


No one cares that you married Edge. We can tell who wears the pants and the panties in that family, and it isn’t YOU! Edge is calling all the shots tonight, and you are just the little submissive wife. GOOD LUCK TO YOU! Please, spare me and the rest of the fans from having to watch you make a fool of yourself any further. 

Either you get a backbone and run SmackDown! or resign from the job. You are a little puppet, and Edge is your puppet master. I, for one, am tired of this storyline and wish that you would move on. 

And low and behold, Triple H answered my prayers and delivered a Twist of Fate of his own.

The WWE Champion made an appearance and gave the two of you the wedding gift of your lives. He showed off the underwear of Edge’s bride to the Charlotte crowd, and he showed us a video that proves that the Wrestling Gods are listening to us.

The video showed your new husband giving your wedding planner Alicia Fox some unneeded CPR in his hotel room the day before he said, "I do" to your stupid ass.

There was no better feeling than seeing you get what was coming to you at the end of the show. I, for one, am thankful that Triple H was able to get his hands on this beautiful piece of footage.

But the biggest thing that made me smile (and stop vomiting) was the “D'OH!” face that Edge gave when he knew he was busted. Can’t wait to see how you try to fix this flop this Sunday.

Which reminds me: Can you send me your address so I can give you the tape of Edge’s appearances on Animal Kingdom with Alicia and Lita?

Good luck trying to Dodge This!