If I Were In Charge: Four College Football Conferences I'd Like to See

Evan WileyCorrespondent IOctober 6, 2016

Part of being an amateur sports blogger means I am free to write about whatever I want. As you might have guessed, I get bored a lot. 

So what's a sports geek to do on a Friday night?

Write about college football and some new radical changes I would make if I were the merciless God of the College Football Universe!


4. The SEC sans Vandy. What to do? Who replaces them?

We can trade them to the ACC for either Clemson or Georgia Tech. We can trade them to the Big East for Louisville. Maybe even swap them to the Sun Belt conference in exchange for Troy. 


3. Notre Dame, Army, and Navy all move to the Big East.

Kick the competition up a notch. Have two geographical divisions: The Big East East and the Big East West. It's time Notre Dame learned they're not so special and should play a conference schedule like everyone else.

They can still have some decent non-conference games, and since they play Navy every year anyway, it's not really that much different. 


2. The BOMC: Battle of the Mascots Conference

On one side, we have the more vigorous names. They can be teams named after incredibly vicious animals like the Michigan Wolverines or Wisconsin Badgers. They can be teams named after natural disasters like the Iowa State Cyclones and the Miami Hurricanes. 

I think it'd be good to have teams named after angry ethnicities such as Notre Dame or the UL-Lafayette Ragin' Cajuns. I'd also like Duke Blue Devils and the Arizona State Sun Devils, as I have this thing for semi-blasphemous team names.

On the other side are teams whose mascots couldn't punch their way out of paper bags. Teams named after inanimate objects like Ohio State, or Stanford and their illustrious Tree, which is certain to cause arborphobic teams to quake with terror. 

Also included are some of the wimpier bird names like the Temple Owls (this is football, not the Secret of NIMH), Oregon Ducks, and the Louisville Cardinals. I'd also like to add the Wake Forest Demon Deacons. Even with "Demon" added to the name, you can't help but think of some guy in a suit on his way to church.  

A stipulation in this conference is that any win may be contested by the losing team and it immediately goes into a literal sudden-death overtime. During this portion of the game, gladiatorial combat ensues between mascots. We know what Hurricanes do to trees, but have you ever stopped to think about what a snarling, hissing badger would do to a duck?  


1. The SUC

Did you lose to a Div. I-AA team last year? Did you have two wins or less last year? You may have just bought yourself a one-way ticket to an easy conference championship in the SUC.

It'd be made of the worst teams from each conference, any one-win teams, plus an "at large" team which would be determined by who had the most embarrassing loss.

It'd be great for teams are "rebuilding" and would give some otherwise hideous teams chances at a winning season. I'll even give them a BCS berth so we can see a good David vs. Goliath type battle in the postseason.

If this conference were real, its 2008 members would be Michigan (at large), Minnesota, Duke, Baylor, Syracuse, SMU, Northern Illinois, Idaho, FIU, Washington, and Mississippi.