Shaun Rogers' Six Shooter Blues

A young cowboy named Shaun grew restless on the Browns
A boy filled with wonderlust who really meant no harm
He changed his clothes and shined his boots
And combed his dark hair down
And his agent cried as he walked out

[Chorus]
Don't take your guns to the airport son
Leave your guns at home Shaun.
Don't take your guns to the airport

[With apologies to Johnny Cash]

Six Gun Shaun Rogers got nabbed at an airport packing heat onto a plane.

Rogers' revolver, likely it was a more modern piece because the old detective Dashiell Hammett .38's really do not pack the punch the modern pro needs, was in a bag locked and loaded.

Rogers is but a biscuit below four bills so he had to be expecting some serious big, bad guys to become belligerent.

Even bourbon sipping, firearms trained air marshall's have doubts about the wisdom of firing a fusillade on an aloft airplane but maybe the big Brown defensive tackle was expecting a terrorist attack or a bunch of Bengals to be on board the big bird.

Opening holes on a speeding airborne aircraft is never a well thought out plan, even for a Brown's game plan, but maybe Rogers considered this.

Perhaps the bulky Brown thought his ability to fight hand to hand, even with a two seat purchase, would be limited in the narrow passageways of the plane.

Shame they outlawed the head slap as it could come in handy in dire situation such as that.

Deacon Jones could cause havoc in an airliner aisle fight even at seventy two.

Still maybe Rogers just had his slick Saturday Night Special still with him from last Saturday night.

Or maybe he was expecting an Easter along the lines of Pulp Fiction.

Who knows what bounces round and round the big Brown's brain.

Either way a man making millions surely could spit for a few greenbacks for a few well trained bodyguards if he felt he was placing himself in dangerous situations.

Surely an ex Seal, off duty cop, or retired marine or three would guard the big Cleveland Brown boy if he felt he might get in a sudden OK Corral situation.

Even randy Ben Roerthlisberger takes off duty coppers with him to guard bar room bath room doors as he drunkenly makes obscene passes, or just mauls and molests, drunken coeds at small universities across the nation.

For want of a comely stripper's tip a man's career is forever damaged and the Browns run defense ruined.

Maybe Rogers needed the rod because he fears someone is going to rob him.

Did the defensive tackle consider that a potential robber might defer the traditional frontal assault on a 370 pound man and instead conjure a plan in which the thief steps behind him with a pistol while a pal points a not so pleasant shotgun at his ample side?

Seldom do situations arise out where Six Gun Shaun Rogers could slap leather like the mythical Old West gun fighter of yore and mow down his assailants in a barrage of hot lead and acrid smoke.

Few fight fair.

No one robs fair.

Ask Wild Bill Hickok perhaps America's most famous pistol-leer about fair fights.

Mean eyed John Wesley Hardin, like Tony Soprano, never say it coming.

Shaun Rogers likely would not get his chance to play Shane.

In reality Doc Holliday carried a shotgun to the OK Corral and Wyatt Earp laid low cranky Curly Bill Brocius with a scatter shot blast.

And old Earp, if had Rogers' millions, never would have packed a piece.

Instead Earp, called by some a fighting pimp, would have bought, and brought, some Pinkerton men as bodyguards.

It was, for Earp, always about getting and protecting the money. And packing a piece has a big price for a big boy like the Cleveland Brown tackle.

It's just not professional.

Before Rogers rolls out his Sam Colt again he might consider bringing Pinkerton men with him instead.  

Or just stay home with his sniper guards waiting all along the watch tower.