HRT To Début Triple Diffuser: Satirical Preview Of Sepang 2010

James Rossi@JRMondoCorrespondent IApril 1, 2010

JEREZ DE LA FRONTERA, SPAIN - FEBRUARY 12:  Sebastian Vettel of Germany (L) and Red Bull Racing shares a joke with a mechanic in their team garage during winter testing at the Circuito De Jerez on February 12, 2010 in Jerez de la Frontera, Spain.  (Photo by Mark Thompson/Getty Images)
Mark Thompson/Getty Images

Little less than a week after a surprisingly eventful Australian Grand Prix, Formula One finds itself in the tropical climes of Malaysia. Weather forecasters have been stumbling over themselves to try and give all Formula One fans a positive outlook, to combat the evil intentions of mother nature, which provided us with a dry day and a dreary race in Bahrain. 

So what is in store, I hear you plead? As per usual in this part of the world, tropical thunderstorms are not out of the norm due to the intense heat rising up in the morning, which cause little wet droplets known as rain to fall back down in the afternoon. Forecasters have predicted precipitation of Noah's Ark proportions on all three days of the event - which can only mean one thing, race fans - that's correct, the sight of an HRT car not being able to start the race due to the fact that they have so little downforce, each car would in fact begin a takeoff roll over 50mph under any form of heavy rain. 

Owing to this forecasted weather, we will perhaps also see the emergence of a young driver who is known to be strong in wet weather conditions. According to paddock insiders, Michael Schumacher is well versed in the art of driving on the edge under duress and still producing results. To aid the German's comeback into F1, strategically placed "pacemaker" cars shall be fitted with extra large barge boards around the circuit, should he find himself in a tricky situation whereby his leading position is threatened.

After Mclaren's triumph in Melbourne, they head to Malaysia confident of another solid result, despite the furore surrounding Lewis Hamilton's public criticism of his team. It has been rumoured that with the Mclaren's tendency to understeer with heavy fuel, Hamilton is seeking assurances that his pitwall engineer will brake extra early for him so he doesn't lose much time. This has led to team mate Button proudly proclaiming that "There is no doubting that I will produce a champion's drive yet again - I can use the accelerator by myself, don't ya know".

Finally, Red Bull Racing will be hoping to finally turn the pace from their NASA designed Apollo 11 Mk II machine into a strong race finish. There were furrowed brows in midweek however, as the Red Bull stickers on the side of the airbox had been found to have peeled off after transportation from Down Under. It never rains but it pours.