I figured I'd change things up this time around—instead of a normal column, I present to you a pair of letters that I think need to be written:
Dear South Carolina Gamecock Nation,
On behalf of the entire Gamecock football program, I apologize for our unacceptable performance over the last four weeks.
After beginning the season with six wins and one loss and rising to sixth in the BCS rankings, we have since lost our last four games to fall out of SEC title contention—and possibly out of bowl contention too.
This is due in large part to the atrocious play of our defense.
I take full responsibility for the horrific performance of the D, which has given up an average of nearly 600 yards of total offense in each of its last two games.
Injuries to key players and errors committed by the offense are no excuse for the putrid play of our defense.
Given the excellent progression of our offense the last three weeks, the defense should have been able to play with the same intensity and talent we showed at the beginning of the season.
Instead, we've failed to tackle, shed blocks, capitalize on our opponents' mistakes, or quite frankly play like anything other than a Pee-Wee team facing the New England Patriots.
I promise that after two weeks of hard, physical practice, our defense will be ready to face our most-hated rival, the Clemson Tigers.
I once again apologize for our unacceptable play.
South Carolina Defensive Coordinator Tyrone Nix
Personally, I'm just hoping that there won't be a repeat of the 63-17 Clemson debacle of four years ago.
And now, I think two individuals owe the USC defense a particular letter of thanks:
Dear South Carolina Defense,
We would like to take the time to thank you for contributing to our renewed Heisman Trophy candidacies.
Thank you for allowing the first of us to rush for 323 yards and one TD, and to throw a touchdown pass. Your efforts allowed him to break the single game SEC rushing record, and to get get his name back in the Heisman talks.
The second of us would like to thank the USC defense for allowing him to score seven touchdowns—five rushing and two passing—and amass 524 yards of total offense. This performance has almost single-handedly pushed him to the top of the Heisman list.
From the bottom of both our hearts, we thank you for considerably boosting our Heisman hopes.
Arkansas RB Darren McFadden and Florida QB Tim "Superman" Tebow
And so. This may seem to you to be an angry rant from a frustrated South Carolina fan...and you would be completely right.
I'm very disappointed in USC's performance over the last four weeks, and I hope this article provides some relief for the ailing Gamecock faithful.
If nothing else, at least it was therapeutic for me.