TNA IMPACT Slamback for December 10: The Road To Final Resolution

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TNA IMPACT Slamback for December 10: The Road To Final Resolution
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This was also posted at Ring-Rap.com.  Haven't seen an iMPACT recap of late on here so I thought I would share this one between the sites.

TNA is heading into its final pay-per-view event of 2009, called Final Resolution .  Here’s what happened tonight on this edition of iMPACT as we make our way to the PPV.

The show opens with Kevin Nash sitting in Mick Foley’s office.  Nash says he’s gotten a face-to-face meeting with Foley set up for “tomorrow” with Hulk Hogan. Nash gives Foley an airline ticket. In typical Kevin Nash fashion, something has to be given up for this. In return, Nash gets to run the show for a night.  Foley hands Nash a DVD that Foley wants shown tonight. Nash then calls up security to get the video surveillance footage from the past three months in the office.

Cutting to the broadcast position next, Mike Tenay tells us that we’re to get a video recap of Foley’s meeting with Jeff Jarett in Nashville. Nash’s music hits and he, along with Eric Young, hit the ring.  Nash tells us that he’s in complete charge and that the audience is in for a treat. Nash recaps that he’s given Mick a meeting with Hulk, that Mick is on his way to the airport.

Nash proceeds to runs down the card for the night. Highlights on the card include: Chris Sabin against all the British Invasion, Eric Young against Hamada for the Global Championship, Velvet Sky against Lacey Von Erich in a mud wrestling match, and a title shot against AJ Styles will go to the highest bidder.  Big Sexy claims he has two hours on his Viagra left and may run in on the mud wrestling match.

We get the first of several segments of the video of Mick Foley’s trip to Nashville. Mick is looking for Dixie at TNA headquarters and can’t find her. He looks like a lost puppy here as he wanders around the building. He finds a guy who goes way back with Jeff. The guy he’s talking to says he could be at the Meats and Three , so that’s Mick’s next destination.

As they come out of commercial we get a plug for ShopTNA.com . They’re having a huge sale, call or click today. Merry Christmas.

Mike Tenay and Taz tell us that there is a three-hour iMPACT on January 4, 2010. Hulk Hogan broke that announcement during the Ultimate Fighter finale this past Saturday night.

The first match is on as British Invasion makes their way to the ring for their three-on-one match against Chris Sabin.  Tenay points out that because Kevin Nash is running the show tonight, World Elite will get preferential treatment.  Sabin makes his way out while Tenay and Taz recap Alex Shelley defeating Doug Williams one-on-one last week.

Sabin is at a distinct disadvantage, but holds his own early on and sends Williams and Magnus to the outside. He’s greeted by a huge clothesline from Rob Terry. BI is making a lot of quick tags in and out. We’re reminded that BI gets the MCMG at Final Resolution for the TNA World Tag Titles. Sabin gets double-teamed from Magnus and Williams for a bit, then Terry is tagged back in. Terry goes for an elbow but misses. Sabin uses that to turn momentum in his favor and hits Terry with a big boot to the face in the corner.  BI accidentally clotheslines Terry as they tried to attack Sabin from behind. Sabin hits a dropkick to Williams and Magnus to send them out of the ring then hits a finisher on Terry for the win. BI has an argument, internally, about the loss after the match.

Since JB is travelling with Foley, we’re treated to Christy Hemme as a backstage interviewer. She has the task of interviewing Scott Steiner about his match with Bobby Lashley. Steiner still thinks the Mafia exists, calling it Nash’s Mafia.  He’s not worried about tonight’s match with the Lashley’s and he doesn’t really need a partner. He’ll find a freak to watch him face the Lashley’s tonight, and you know what he likes to do with his freaks. Steiner is gold on the mic sometimes.

Out of commercial, we see more about Mick’s search for Jeff Jarrett. Mick is talking to “Ruby” about Jeff Jarrett’s whereabouts. Ruby hasn’t seen Jeff Jarrett in a month or more. Mick asks for her to let him know if he shows up, which she says she will.

Mixed Tag time, Bobby and Krystal Lashley make their way to the ring. We get a recap of the TNA Championship series, where Lashley got a title shot on Thanksgiving night by winning the tournament. Krystal looks scared to death, according to Tenay. Steiner makes his way out. Taz and Tenay talk about how Steiner has almost been stalking Krystal, and try to figure out who would be Steiner’ partner. His partner will be Awesome Kong.

Krystal looks scared to death as Bobby and Steiner hook up in the start.  Steiner bails from the ring and eventually Lashley goes out after him.  Both men end up back in the ring, and after some chops by Steiner Lashley, are sent into the far corner.  Lashley gets an elbow then press-slams Steiner.  Lashley hits a shoulder block, then hits the suplex on Steiner into a two-count.  Kong trips Bobby to give Steiner a chance to get a shot in the back.  Kong gets in to square off with Lashley, but accidentally clotheslines Steiner.  The distraction is enough to allow Bobby to hit a T-bone Suplex.  Both men to the outside again and Steiner throws Bobby into the stairs.  Krystal ends up in the ring, trapped between Kong and Steiner.  Kong slams her then goes to the top rope for a splash, but Steiner pins Krystal.  He does pushups over her after the match and then Bobby chases them out.

Lauren tells us Feast or Fired is back for Final Resolution.  Samoa Joe is in the match, and says he sat home missing opportunities to compete for the title.  That’s why he wants to be in the Feast or Fired match.  He wants his shot at the title again. Beer Money comes out and reminds Joe that he could get the “Fired” case.  Beer Money, even with the risk, says it’s worth the shot because they have had the same issue in chasing down the tag titles.

Beer Money has a conversation between themselves.  There's a Little bit of friction between them about entering the Feast or Fired match because of the risk to end Beer Money as a team.

We get a teaser of the Hogan announcement on The Ultimate Fighter Finale as they go to commercial.

Short return where Nash is measuring the mud that Lacey and Velvet will wrestle in later.  He’s being really detailed about this and has stagehands add more mud to it.

As we come back from commercial, gift buyers are given this message: “Buy your favorite TNA fan a subscription to the TNA Video Vault for Christmas.”

Now we’re backstage with The Beautiful People.  They’re upset about the mud wrestling match and are gathering their things up to leave.  Nash makes his way into the room and says “this is about ratings, ladies.”  Nash believes millions will watch this match simply because it’s TBP.  He encourages them to imagine the attention people will give this.  Nash goes on to tell them that ratings are money, too – and TBP love to shop.   Nash pulls out a striped nightie-type shirt and says Madison will get the referee’s duty. TBP has bought in now to do this and begins to put their stuff back in their lockers.  Lacey throws some dumb line out at the end and Velvet says “she’s so pretty though, Bless your heart…”  Typical Lacey.

Next up is a video montage related to Sting, with different clips that fit into Hogan coming into TNA.  There’s been no word from Sting about his future, to this point.  He was to do an interview several weeks ago, but no-showed for it.

Next, we get a recap of the video from The Ultimate Fighter Finale   where Hogan made the announcement of the January 4 live iMPACT that will air head-to-head against WWE’s Raw .

Lauren is backstage with Tara.  Tara’s not happy about the match tonight, and especially having to drink heavily before wrestling.  However, Tara admits she will drink a keg to get her hands on ODB, but still has no idea how she’ll perform tonight in the ring.

Christy Hemme is interviewing Eric Young about his intergender match with Hamada.  Eric Young wouldn’t have it any other way, and wouldn’t do it for anyone else but Nash.  He’s breaking his rule about defending the belt on US soil, but says that at least he is defending it against a foreigner.  WE has had their eye on Hamada and wants her to bring her best, like it’s an initiation.  Tonight is her shot to make an impression with WE.

Hamada makes her way out – she has been impressive amongst the Knockouts, but this is a completely different animal.  Eric Young is out next.  Tenay reiterates that this is an exception to the WE rules of not defending the belt on US soil, but it’s ok because it’s against a foreigner.  Tenay and Taz discuss whether or not this is really a joke.  Tenay poses a good point: There’s more to this than what EY is saying (that this is for Nash, a tryout for Hamada, etc.), and that this match will end up a joke win for EY.

Tenay reminds us that Hamada beat both members of the Knockout tag champs. They tie up, but Young backs off both times.  Hamada hits a spin kick that takes EY out of the ring, and follows up with chops and headbutts.  She throws him to the corner but gets a big boot from EY on the run in.  Hamada catches him with another kick, then hits the hurricanrana off the ropes for two.   She then goes for the moonsault but misses.  EY gets a cheap pin using the ropes for leverage.  EY retains the belt, and Hamada questions the referee about EY’s use of the ropes.

Another backstage vignette with TBP.  They’re talking about things they could do to be sure to get the ratings.  Maybe things like a wardrobe malfunction, or a three-way kiss on TV like they’ve teased about for a while now.  They’re all good thoughts, but Velvet seems to think they just need to wrestle and let the best one win.

Back to Mick Foley’s search for Jeff Jarrett.  Mick is guessing at this point that Jeff doesn't want to be found.  He’s at a bar called Barefoot Charlie’s .  The thought dawns on him to go to the Asylum , as he might be there.  He asks directions of the waitress to get to I-40 East when a voice from the bar says “looking for somebody?”  Looks as if Jeff Jarrett is sitting at the bar.

ODB has been drinking hard, getting ready for the Trailer Park Throwdown .  We get a video of her backstage pounding the beer and shots down, with her trademark silver flask stuck in her bra.

Coming back from commercial, Taz is asking if that was indeed Jarrett at the bar.

Christy Hemme is talking to a very drunk ODB.  ODB asks why they named tonight’s match TrailerPark Throwdown .  This is business as usual for her, so what’s the big deal?  ODB’s going to give Tara a hangover well beyond Final Resolution.

Tara is out first, with Poison in one hand and a beer in the other.  She looks ill.   We get a short video of  how Tara got embaarassed on ODB’s “program” last week.  ODB comes out and Taz says she’s bombed beyond belief.   ODB offers a bucket to Tara to throw up in because she can’t handle her booze.  Tara fakes throwing up into the bucket but instead whacks ODB with it.  Anything goes in this match, and there are weapons all around the ring.  Taz is going to puke if one of the women does.

Lots of weapons use in this one as Tara throws ODB into a wheelbarrow.  ODB uses her flask to turn momentum and wraps Tara up in caution tape and starts throwing things at her.  ODB tosses Tara back into the ring.  Comedy at the broadcast table between Taz and Tenay about things backing up in the trailerpark during ODB’s use of a plunger as a weapon.  ODB slingshots Tara into a ladder.  ODB starts to climb the ladder, but decides otherwise and gets a stepstool instead.  Splash off the stepstool gets a two-count.  ODB starts to choke Tara with the stick across the throat but Tara flips her onto her back to turn momentum.  Exchange of trash can lid shots until ODB’s lid goes flying.  Tara stars pounding the daylights out of her with the can lid.  Puts a lid on ODB then moonsaults onto it.  Tara went for the ropes, but the booze caught up with her and she slipped and fell.  ODB starts choking her with the chain.  ODB hits a “pedigree-like move” face first into a chair and ODB picks up the win.

We get another Jarrett – Foley segment.  Mick asks Jeff, “Where have you been? You look like hell.”  Jarrett says he’s been living in hell. Jeff asks Mick, “Why are you here, why did you come to town?”  Foley says, “I know Double J can’t stay away from wrestling.”  Jeff Jarrett says Double J can’t, but Jeff Jarrett can.

The Bound for Glory 2009 DVD is coming out.  A two-disc set with the Before the Glory edition, as well as the entire pay per view.  Should be good stuff—the pay-per-view was decent.

Eight man tag is up next, and it’s a preview of the elimination tag match between the same opponents at Final Resolution .  The stipulation in this match is that the one who gets pinned will wrestle five minutes in the ring with the opposing team alone.  Bubba Ray grabs the stick and says “hey, this is going to be a handicap match, because The Pope isn’t going to make it…”. Jesse Neal came out wearing The Pope’s jacket.  Some heel heat on Bubba.  The other team, made up of Hernandez, Suicide, and Matt Morgan, make their way out.  The Pope was to be on this team, but has been taken out by Bubba, D-Von, Jesse Neal, and Rhino.

It’s now a four-on-three tag match and Rhino starts against Morgan. Quick tag to D-Von, then Morgan is able to tag out to Suicide.  D-von tags Bubba, putting Bubba’s size against Suicide’s quickness.  Suicide gets an arm-drag, Bubba throws Suicide to the corner but can’t follow it up, as Suicide is too quick.  Jesse Neal kicks Suicide off the ring apron and their team takes control.  Jesse Neal goes to work on Suicide.  What’s with Jesse’s mohawk?  Quick tag to Rhino and more heavy offense with a shoulder block in the corner.  Another quick tag to D-Von with big hands in the corner on Suicide.  Suicide is stuck away from his corner to make a tag out.

D-Von tries to get a splash in the corner but Suicide gets his feet up, then a drop kick.  Finally he tags to Hernandez and D-Von tags in Jesse.  Hernandez is on fire, taking out all four members of the other team.  Hernandez with a big shoulder block on Neal, then takes out all three members of the other team on the outside by diving over the top rope.  Hernandez gets Neal up and hits a slam, Bubba Ray hits Hernandez with a bomb, and Morgan gives the carbon footprint to Bubba.  Rhino with a belly to belly, then Suicide nails Rhyno with a dropkick off the ropes.  D-Von has Hernandez on the top rope, but SuperMex fights him off and gets D-Von up for the Border Toss.  Jesse Neal hits a spear out of nowhere on Hernandez and gets the pin.

3D and company start beating down on Suicide after the match, but The Pope hits the ring, leg heavily bandaged and a chair in hand, to make the save.  Hernandez will face Team 3D, Jesse and Rhino for five minutes four-on-one.

We get another reminder about TNAShop.com ’s Christmas sale, coming out of commercial.

We get a short training montage for Tyson Tomko, who is coming back to TNA soon.  As they cut to the announce table, Mike Tenay and Taz have rain gear on.  It’s time for the mud wrestling match with TBP.  Madison is the referee, and Lacey is wrestling against Velvet.

Madison looks hot in her referee stripes.  Lacey and Velvet think they’re getting in the normal ring, but Madison points to the mud pool.  Velvet’s got her short shorts on and Lacey in a pair of daisy-dukes.  We get the tease of a three-way kiss as the three get in the mud pool.  Tenay says that this is the six sides of plastic, not the six sides of steel.  Honestly, not much of a wrestling match at all.  A few technical moves here and there, like a rear mount by Velvet to start.  Lots of slipping and sliding around.  This is the proudest moment of Taz’s announcing career. Madison takes a dive in the mud at one point as well, and  Tenay calls for a three-way.  Velvet pins Lacey for the win.  As Madison raises Velvet’s hand, Lacey trips the other of them into the mud.  What much is there really to say about this match except three hot blondes rolling around in skimpy clothes in the mud.  Moving on.

Lauren is backstage with Jay Lethal, and the Black Machismo Invitational is coming back.  Lauren reminds him about his match with Jim “The Anvil” Neidhart a few weeks back.  Lethal says “I can’t prepare for a match if I don’t know who I’m wrestling.”  Lauren reminds him it’s an invitational, and Jay invited him.  Jay Lethal says he is bringing the invitational back and he is going to start beating his opponents.  Eventually, he’ll re-write the history books with Hogan.  Maybe he’ll lose the Macho Man schtick along the way.

AJ Styles is making his way to the ring to face his mystery opponent, who was to be the “highest bidder” as Nash stipulated at the beginning of the show. Coming back from commercial, Nash is giving David Penzer the name of the highest bidder.  This match is up next.

More with Foley and Jarrett and how Foley invested in TNA because he trusted him.  Foley thinks the acquisition of Hogan put his investment at risk.  JJ said he founded TNA with his blood, tears and own money.  Jeff didn’t feel the penalty fit the crime, so the conversation’s over.  Mick challenges JJ’s manhood about what he’s given so much for. Mick goes to leave and says “find someone else to raise your two girls while you’re at it.”  JJ says “it’s three, Mick, sit down. We need to talk.”

AJ Styles makes his way out to the ring.  We still don’t know who the opponent is as it was up to the highest bidder.  Desmond Wolfe was the man with the highest bid and he makes his way out.  Taz and Tenay remind us that the challengers to AJ’s title are numerous – Daniels at Final Resolution , and Lashely gets his shot also at some point, but it’s all moot if he loses to Wolfe tonight.

Kurt Angle makes his way out to watch this match at the broadcast table.  Kurt will face Wolfe in a three-degrees-of-pain match at Final Resolution .  Kurt says that it’s a match where one fall is by submission, one is by pinfall, and the third, if it goes that far, is to escape the cage.  Wolfe starts off with good offense and is working on AJ’s arm.  Taz points out that Kurt came to the table and didn’t get involved in the match right away.  Kurt said he isn’t going to interrupt AJ’s match, out of respect for the champion.

AJ hits a dropkick and then gets an armlock at the ropes, but Wolfe breaks the hold.  Wolfe ends up in the corner and AJ goes for a splash, but Wolfe moves.  Wolfe goes back to work on the arm again.  Angle keeps mentioning how calculating Wolfe is and how he finds an injury or weakness and exploits it fully, as Wolfe continues to work the arm.  AJ gets a break and then starts to turn the match around again in his favor with some chops and a high elevation.  AJ hits his familiar springboard forearm off the ropes, but then Wolfe gets an odd kick to the groin.  At first it looked accidental, but you see Wolfe smile and point to his head. Very calculated move.

Daniels makes his way out to the ring and grabs Wolfe’s leg, causing a distraction.  AJ grabs Wolfe from behind and gets a roll-up from the distraction to win, and retain his title. Daniels and Wolfe exchange words, and a few punches, on the ramp, until referees come out to separate the scrum.

The conclusion of the Foley-Jarrett conversation is next.

It’s been five months since Jeff has talked to “her”, meaning Dixie Carter. Mick is trying to get him to talk to her.  Mick reminds Jeff that he founded TNA, and Dixie has to respect that. There would be no TNA without Jeff.  Jeff needs to forget the past, go to Orlando, and it will be the way it gets things done.  Jeff says “Let’s do this.”  Jarrett will be returning, possibly next week.

The show was a little average tonight.  I’m sure the 18-year-old boys in the audience got a thrill out of the mud wrestling match, but from a wrestling fan’s perspective that time could have been used better.  I didn’t feel the program tonight really added all that much to the storylines heading into Final Resolution .  With Final Resolution about two weeks away, there’s still time to build the storylines up a little bit more.

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