Charlie Weis Hired as New Jersey Nets Coach (Satire)
In a stunning turn of events the New Jersey Nets have hired former Notre Dame football coach, Charlie Weis. Weis was fired by Notre Dame and hired by the New Jersey Nets in less than 24 hours.
Weis is the first college football coach to be hired by an NBA team as a head coach. The New Jersey Nets' Rob Thorn said, "We are very excited to have Charlie on the sidelines for the team. We hope that he can connect well with our players and turn our season around in a positive direction."
When asked to comment about his new coach, Devin Harris said, "Experience isn't everything. Sometimes all you have to do is know what you are doing. Charlie knows exactly what he wants to do. I smell an NBA Finals appearance under Weis."
Charlie Weis is expected to hold a press conference early Wednesday morning at the Izod Center, hours before his team takes on the Dallas Mavericks. Right from his first game he will try to avoid setting an NBA record for most losses to start a season with 0-18.
In a statement released by Charlie Weis and his agent he said, "New Jersey Nets fans expect more from their team. 0-17 is not enough. If the Nets hired me to go .500 or below, they got the wrong guy."
Sound familiar? Weis made a similar statement when he was hired as the head coach for the Fighting Irish.
According to multiple reports, Charlie Weis is expected to make $24 million for four years. The Nets wanted to agree on a similar contract to that of the Knicks' Mike D'Antoni. The money is coming straight from the pockets of their soon-to-be owner, Mikhail Prohorov.
It will be interesting to see how this scenario plays out for the Nets. They have an inexperienced coach with a young team. The Nets had other options in Avery Johnson and Byron Scott but they elected to go down this road.
In the minds of the Nets' front office they see LeBron James, Devin Harris, the 2010 No. 1 overall draft pick, and Charlie Weis all under the lights of their new arena in Brooklyn.
Will this all come true and sell seats? Or will it just explode and remain a dream in the minds of the Nets' people? Only time will tell.
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