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Right, it's Week 11 of the college football season, and I'm still trying to work who's better: Texas, Florida, or Alabama (not necessarily in that order).
I've got friends who are Texas and Alabama fans, but I haven't found a UF fan who doesn't say in conversation, "But you don't understand, do you? Tim Tebow is TRULY the Son of God."
I would get into a longer religious debate about this, but if I piss off half the people I did when I wrote quasi-inflammatory/very jokey/not to be taken too seriously things about Joseph Smith and BYU-TCU, I'll probably get closed down.
Anyway—my Week 11 predictions:
FRIDAY NIGHT
West Virginia vs. Cincinnati
Over the years, it would have been an easy prediction: West Virginia by 14 or more.
But now, Cincinnati's got an offense to die for, and they're scoring points like it's going out of fashion. West Virginia haven't been brilliant this year, but they've got a game changer in the speedy superfreak Noel Devine.
This is going to be fun.
Prediction: Cincy wins by 14 in a high-scoring game that puts the Saturday schedule to shame.
SATURDAY
Utah vs. TCU
Utah was the non-BCS team of 2008; TCU is the non-BCS team of 2009. They've got a better schedule than Boise State—and the road wins at Clemson and BYU are pretty impressive.
In front of a College GameDay crowd (they probably want to see how Christian the Horned Frogs actually are), TCU is going to be on the map.
Prediction: TCU win in a tight one.
Indiana vs. Penn State
Indiana were unlucky to lose to Michigan and Iowa, and despite what the bookies think, they will give Penn State a real battle this weekend.
I expect the Nittany Lions to overcome the problems of last week—i.e. lack of scoring due to an ineffective offensive line—and I'd like to see a little more Kevin Newsome.
There are also worries that Evan Royster could skip to the NFL. Here's the VFA's take on that: Evan! Horrible, horrible idea!
Prediction: Penn State doesn't excite, but they win by 21. Shame that it'll be on the Big Ten Network.
Iowa vs. Ohio State
If College GameDay hadn't been to Columbus for the USC game, they probably would be in the center of things for this one.
It's going to be a doozy.
With Ricky Stanzi out, the Hawkeyes are going to have to go into the cauldron of hate known as The Horseshoe—not easy.
Prediction: Even if Stanzi was still in, I'd call an Iowa loss. This makes it easier. Ohio State by 14.
Stanford vs. USC
If there's a mouthier coach than Jim Harbaugh outside of the SEC, we'd like to see him.
But you know what? He's been spot-on with his recruiting.
The Cardinal dumped on Oregon last week, and how sweet would a victory be in the Coliseum? Probably not very to the USC home crowd!
Prediction: USC win, but it's going to be as tight as those Song Girls' tops.
Alabama vs. Mississippi State
The romantic in me is calling for a win for MSU, but my head says that they can't play nearly as well as they did against LSU and Florida. Mark Ingram's looking all the way a Heisman winner, and yes, Alabama is rollin'.
Prediction: Alabama win. But it's going to be close.
Florida vs. South Carolina
South Carolina shocked anyone who didn't think Ole Miss was totally overrated when they beat the Rebels on Thursday night, and they were unlucky not to knock off Georgia.
The "Cocks" erratic offense hasn't been that fun to watch, but defensive future Colombian-shirt retiree Eric Norwood may still eat Tim Tebow alive on Saturday.
Will that stop the Gators?
Prediction. No. Florida has too much damned talent.
Auburn vs. Georgia
Another night game in Athens, and my buddies won't be complaining.
For these Dawg fans, it'll be Jack Daniels from the early hours and a lot of cheering, using the words "War Tiger!" to confuse the Auburnites.
This game is going to be hellish entertaining because a) UGA vs. AU games always are, b) the two teams hate each other, and c) both teams can't defend worth ****, to use a Southern colloquial term, y'all.
Prediction: Georgia! Bulldogs! Win by 14.
Miami vs. North Carolina
Ever since they lost to Virginia Tech, the Hurricanes have been somewhat under the radar.
So get this: Jacory Harris can play.
Miami has a ton of speed. But Butch Davis, the UNC coach, is a good coach—and the last time the Heels played a ranked opponent, they beat 'em.
Prediction: All signs point to Davis...and a classic. Miami on a last-second field goal.
Georgia Tech vs. Duke
Great opportunity for the BSC-ers to watch the option at play, which we've renamed the 911 Option. Why?
Because the triple option has broken so many freaking hearts this year, we're calling the police for murder, and the ambulance to help mend.
Prediction: Dial 1-800-TECH-WIN-BY-21
Texas vs. Baylor
Jordan. Shipley. Heisman. Colt McCoy. NFL?
Prediction: Texas by 31. This team's playing well, kids.
And the Game of the Week...Notre Dame vs. Pittsburgh
If there's one team fighting for its life at the moment, it's Notre Dame.
If the Irish ***-up, then Charlie Weis is out of a job. Period.
But if the Irish win, Fat Charlie and the Archangel won't be filing for a divorce (it's a Paul Simon reference, people!), because they've beaten a top 10 team.
If they do, they'll have to stop Pitt RB Dion Lewis, who's sharp.
Prediction: Weis in Wintry Upset. Irish by 10.
Now back to that Paul Simon song...it's fan-freakin'-tastic!
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