BT's 31 Scariest Sports Things and Thoughts for Halloween

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For every holiday, people develop their own traditions.

Granted, Halloween isn’t exactly a holiday, but it’s a day to relax and get re-acquainted with friends—whether you’re dressed up like Barack Obama or not.

So, as we do every Halloween, it’s time for BT’s list of 31 Terrifying Sports Trends and Ideas .

1.White Guy Moments: It seems that with every new batch of athletes there comes a group that gives us brand new “white guy” moments.

From watching Mark Sanchez try and pump up the crowd against Buffalo a few weeks ago when no one was looking at him and he just seemed to be awkwardly flailing, to Eli Manning berating Ahmad Bradshaw while he’s got his arm around him, white athletes have the most confusing mannerisms.

You’d think that with all of that coordination and athletic that they’d be better dancers too. Unfortunately, you’d be wrong . 

2. Brett Favre and the Minnesota Vikings: We all knew that the Minnesota Vikings needed a quarterback, and we all knew that Brett Favre wasn’t going to realistically retire (The line is at -3.5 that he becomes the first quarterback to rush for positive yardage in a walker), but I don’t think anyone expected what’s happened.

Alright. That's wrong. We all expected him to go to Minnesota, he just needed a stop over in New York and a shoulder injury first.

The fact is, all Favre keeps doing is giving hope for other old guys. I mean, is a Guy Lafleur comeback that unrealistic thanks to all of this? Maybe Gordie Howe still wants to play hockey.

The Steelers/Vikings game was nice because we got a full dosage of Brett Favre’s “Where are my keys” face. And no, I’m not stealing from Bill Simmons—it’s simply the best way I can describe that face.

On the bright side, we at least know when Ricky Williams and Shaq are going to retire.

3. Joe Thornton + 100 assists: The only players in NHL history with 100 assist seasons are Bobby Orr, Wayne Gretzky, and Mario Leamieux—which is pretty standard company in a club like that.

As it stands, Thornton has had 96 and 92 assist seasons in his career in San Jose (and a bit in Boston), and seems to have the most realistic shot at breaking in to triple digits.

Toss along Dany Heately and all of the sudden you may have a formula for big-time assist totals.

4. The Grand Slam of Golf: This is the PGA’s great idea to expand the schedule? Throw in a four-player tournament that only gets play in the last five minutes of the first half-hour of Sportscentre? Sure, that’ll work.

And what happens if Tiger Woods (because let’s face it, in the next 50 years NO ONE ELSE will have a chance at it) decides to go and win a Grand Slam. Does he just golf against himself four times a day for two days?

Actually...people would probably watch that. Throw in celebrity caddies while Tiger does his “me against me” bit and then they may have something.

5. Jim Zorn still has a job: Look, I’m not ripping him for being a bad coach. Fact is he’s doing a better job than I could ever do. Besides, the Washington Redskins have all but said it for me.

But to take away his play-calling abilities and just make him a muppet that walks up and down the sidelines? That’s kind of insulting isn’t it? Is there even any reason for him to hold a playcard anymore like he did on the Monday-Nighter?

It’s not like this is a secret either…EVERYONE knows.

Then again, they lost to Detroit. Maybe Kermit the Frog could do a better job.

6. Jim Zorn Part B:

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