For those unaware of this Creature vs. Creature, the topic in on "the worst wrestler in the WWE toady," organised by Svyato Rovenchuk.

My entry, as is apparent from the title, is on The Great Khali. If you still want to get involved with the CvC, just ask Svyato, and he'll let you know which wrestlers are already taken.

Anyway, on to my article...

A packed courtroom is in attendance to witness the trial of The Great Khali, charged with being the worst wrestler currently in the WWE. Many of his World Wrestling Entertainment colleagues are in attendance, and most seem noticeably tense.

After several minutes of uneasy conversation between those in attendance, it becomes clear that the trial will soon be underway, as a bailiff makes his way to the head of the courtroom to address everyone congregated. The room falls silent, and he begins proceedings.

“Please rise,” opens the bailiff. “Now presiding, the honourable judge...erm...oh, it’s you! Yes, you, the reader, are the judge of this case. Only you can decide the fate of The Great Khali based on the evidence you will be presented with here today. Everyone may be seated.”

After a brief pause, the bailiff recomposes himself and continues. “This court will come to order. Please call Dalip Singh Rana, 'The Great Khali,' to the courtroom.”

Khali enters the room, ducking through the door. A bevy of whispers and remarks emanate from the gallery, which notably disturbs Khali, who must feel the whole courtroom is against him.

Khali takes his position and is addressed by the bailiff. “Mr. Rana, you are before this court today faced with the charge of being the worst wrestler currently in the WWE. Your defence lawyer has already expressed your decision to plead not guilty. Can you verify that that is true?” Khali simply nods in agreement.

“For the record, please note that Mr. Rana expressed a yes gesture through a nod. Speaking of your defence lawyer, where is he?”

Vince McMahon bursts through the rear doors of the courtroom and begins a hurried strut to the front. “Sorry I’m late,” he bellows as he performs his trademark walk, “just got through firing a few more of my valued employees. I fancied buying a new private jet, and that money’s got to come from somewhere. What did I miss?”

“Mr. McMahon, would you be so kind to take your seat?” Vince follows the bailiff’s instructions. “I was just verifying with the defendant that his plea is not guilty.”

“Of course it’s not guilty,” says Vince, “a man of that size must be a good wrestler, a 'Great' wrestler in fact.” McMahon chuckles in awe of his well-timed pun; no one else seems amused.

The bailiff continues the proceedings. “I find it a little odd that you, Mr. McMahon, wish to defend your own employee, but nevertheless. With the charges stated, can the prosecution begin its case?” A mysterious figure begins to rise from his seat. The prosecution lawyer Jev Thorpe takes centre stage, and begins his opening statement.

“Ladies and Gentlemen of Bleacher Report, I speak to you today as a proud wrestling fan. A fan who is tired of seeing good-for-nothing excuses of wrestlers on his TV screen, when less talented superstars are withering away beneath them.

"The Great Khali is the epitome of all that is wrong with the WWE, a case I hope to more than prove to you today.

"When one considers the qualities that make a wrestler great, these usual suspects typically emerge: athleticism, microphone skills, wrestling acumen, the ability to work a crowd, a solid move set, and charisma.

"There are many other characteristics that could be associated with great wrestlers, but nigh on all of them will not be possessed by the defendant, The Great Khali.

"Vince McMahon has been seemingly high on large wrestlers for a while, a trait that far too depressingly has seen the demise of any form of cruiserweight/lightweight division in the WWE.”

Vince sits uncomfortably in his seat, aware that the allegations brought against his name are true. He tries to shrug off the remark with a carefree smile, but Jev knows he has hit his target with his observation.

“Big men will always be a part of the pro wrestling equation,” Jev continues, “but size alone should not be sufficient in maintaining a spot amongst the elite in the WWE.

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