Commander's Call: Is the Crimson Tide Stain an Illness or Ignorance?

As an SEC West football intel analyst, I know that Alabama fans have this self-righteous proclamation to nothing but their very own superiority and class above the entire field of college football programs. 

This air of greater belonging and self-medicating worth, which even their loyal fans of bottom-dwelling origins include themselves as a part of, is downright disturbing. The upper crust of football and even society, according to Alabama fans, is their prerogative. 

This is regardless of their affiliation to the University itself, which generally doesn't bother me.

It’s an old and frequent state of mental instability that was never scientifically identified—until now.

This condition is called The Crimson Tide Stain.

This condition is a part of daily life where I come from. Alabama football is king, and houndstooth is vogue. It's a fact that Crimson Tide teams of their hallowed past served as the recognized symbol of college football dominance during the 1960s and 1970s. Don't you remember the Bear? 

Tide fans of all ages will never let you forget Bear Bryant. I admit that we shouldn't; after all, a womanizing, mean old drunk is worth idolizing, whether we speak of my dad or the most successful college football coach of all time. It is what it is.

Now, in the age of wonder, with mass media and people's Internet voices louder and stronger than their actual backbone, this phenomenon of superiority rings louder than ever before.

Listen up! You Internet bullies need to take heed to this warning; this is a call to you gristle backs of limited experience and inundated knowledge of the past.

Lest we forget the past, we are doomed to repeat it...good thing Alabama fans sure as heck won’t allow that!

Currently about 50 percent of Alabama fans are digitally capable of spewing their enormity of mind-numbing historical football data on a widespread level, and it got me thinking: "Why aren't these Bama fans standing in the unemployment line running their mouths where they belong?"

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