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Cleveland Browns: How Do You Spell 0-16?

A.L. BenzContributor ISeptember 23, 2009

In my Week One article following the loss to the Vikings, I attached a simple poll: "Do you think the Browns will improve upon last year's 4-12 record?"

Over 100 votes later, the results weighed toward a resounding yes with some 73 percent. Only 12 percent chose no, with even the toungue-in-cheek choice of "Does it really matter?" garnering a higher 16 percent.

I wonder how the people feel after this week's debacle?

If there was one game—besides Detroit—fans penciled in for a win, it was Denver. An underwhelming quarterback and rookie running back, coupled with a suspect defense incorporated of former Browns rejects looked ripe for a victory on paper. Unfortunately, the teams have to actually play out the game, and we all know how that ended.

To say that the rebuilding process is behind schedule is an understatement. Comparing the Browns to a housing project, the loony architect has not even settled on a blueprint and the building material is all moldy and warped.

The quarterback we moved up to draft more than a year ago, hailed as the prodigy that would pull the franchise out of its losing muck, did not even get to play three games last year and was denied first-team reps this offseason due to a foolish competition. Is it any wonder why he looks so awful out there?

The running back we should have drafted is breaking all kind of NFL records and predicted to pass 2,000 yards this year. Instead, we feature a has-been power-runner nearing his Social Security check-years who's slower than my one-legged cat.

Don't get me started on the receivers. We have an egotistical moody fellow from Michigan who thinks he gets paid per drop. Meanwhile, the two highly acclaimed receivers drafted in the second round have a grand total of zero catches between them.

We are trying to turn an inexperienced special team punt returner into a second receiver. Oh, and we traded our one passionate sure-handed receiver for a bag of peanuts in the preseason.

Our defense cannot stop the run—in a run-oriented division, no less. And our much-hyped pass defense just gave up nearly 300 yards to Kyle freaking drunk-man Orton. Enough said.

Everyone and their grandmother banged on Peter King for his foolish 2-14 prediction. Well, who looks like the fool now? This team is in total disarray and it would not surprise me if they serve a big fat donut this season.

I am attaching the same poll as last week, and guess the results will be vastly different. Too bad we can't play the Lions every game.

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