In honor of The Greatest 2-Sport Athlete Of All Time, Mr. James Nathaniel Brown, we’re running through every position on the lacrosse field and giving you the best would-be laxers of the NFL. After all, lacrosse was his favorite sport.
After last Sunday’s Top 5 Longpoles, talk is starting to get heated. Today we’re highlighting the Top 5 Attackmen of the NFL. QB’s, RB’s, WR’s, Tight Ends. Put ‘em in a bucket and some say the sport of lacrosse would drastically change. @LaxAllStars? We feel like these guys would bring extra athleticism, tenths of speed, and in some cases, a suitable swagger. Yes… they could impact the game.
5. MARK SANCHEZ
Just like our boy Maualuga he hasn’t completely proved himself yet, but then again he did just beat out Tom Brady and the Patriots this afternoon. The media loves him and he gets the girl. Earlier tonight Dan Patrick even called him “The King of New York City.” Sanchez is a leader in the spotlight. Could he be the best feeder from X in the NFL?
4. BRANDON JACOBS
Meet Brandon Jacobs. This BIG man from Southern Illinois always produces when the Giants need it the most. Rodney Harrison recently said Jacobs was the only running back he’s ever been afraid of. His blood boils. After trucking for over 1000 yard in ‘07 and ‘08 we can only expect the best from Jacobs this year. Truth: a 6-foot pole probably wouldn’t stand a chance against this guy’s hustle.
3. CHRIS COOLEY
Funnyman Chris Cooley does work. 321 receptions, 3,525 yds, 29 touchdowns in 5 seasons. Not too shabby for a tight end. Can we compare him to Notre Dame TE turned Maryland standout attackman Will Yeatman? I think so. Oh, and Cooley also catches footballs through walls, blogs at The Cooley Zone, and has pulled a few onfield antics in his day. Sounds like a lax bro to me.
2. DARREN SPROLES
The fastest man in the NFL? Check. More agile than a gazelle? Check. Save him for the offensive side of the field, give him the ball and count it. Trust me, I just got 28 points out of him tonight in J-Mat’s Fantasy Football League. Added bonus: throw him down as a clearing middie from time-to-time and expect greatness. Is there one player in the MLL who could stop Darren Sproles if he had stick skills? Enough said.
1. CHAD OCHOCINCO
Chad Ochocinco eats McDonalds 3 times a day in training camp, Ustreams in his sleep, and guarentees beat-downs against welterweight champions. This versatile player even raced a horse and won. You need a certain attitude to be an effective attackman, and Esteban has those diva qualities that aren’t uncommon on the offensive side of the field.
“Ochocinco with the hat trick!” Can you feel it? Sign the ball and throw it to the crowd. Don’t think he’d be an asset? Child please! #85 would run his d-man dry and put one through the 5-hole all while being the first pro lacrosse player to ever tweet from the field.
Got a better 5? Let’s hear ‘em.