They Clone Horses Don't They?

Big Red vs Big Brown for the Clone Crown?

It could happen.

Thoroughbreds can be cloned just like cows, goats, pigs, and Freddy Kruger movies. The Italians have already done it. So why not roll out the legends?

Secretariat v Seattle Slew?  Citation vs Affirmed?  Man o War vs Count Fleet?

Great, or even good, horses no longer run past three years of age, so why not breed a duplicate and let it run...and run...and run...

Removed from the exact conditions of their rearing, will they run the same? Or will they be cloned slackers?  Can the trainers shape a winner? Is it natural or is it the environment?

Remember the Todd Marinovich lab experiment? Al Davis does...

Will Secretariat 2030 run the same as the real one? Will he beat his current horse kin? Will superior food and advanced training create an even greater horse?

What about a Funny Cide or a Cigar? Great horses that can reproduce?

How about a step further, Jack Dempsey versus Mike Tyson? Ali vs Joe Louis? Sonny Liston vs George Foremen? Joe Frazier vs Rocky Marciano?

Would the clone beat the modern real fighters? Well—the current heavyweight crop is horrid...bet the clones against the drones.

Could you beat Great Grandpa's twenty-seven-year-old clone in a bar fight? Well okay chubby fellow Americans—how bout a race...no? Its not really Gramps, its a Clone—now hit him sissy! Out think the Clone....ouch Gramps that hurt.

Battle Royal of the boxing clones? Without the desire and drive of a generally rough, or at least tough, upbringing will a clone have the same drive? Or will the clone be just another buffed drone?

How about a genetically engineered cloned Offensive Tackle? A Munozenstein or FrankenForrestGreg made just for football. Built to last three times longer then the original.

Will some future Defense End, perhaps named Robert Neville, be the last non-football-designed Defense Lineman struggling to pressure the Quarterback? 

It will bring a whole new meaning to the name Football Factories....and that's before some Jerry Jones 2055 introduces BotBlockers.

Imagine Kasparov in chess being the last human to try to beat a Robot Tackle to sack the Quarterback? 

Remember the old Saturday Night Live skit question? Can eleven miniature Ditka's beat a full sized Football team? Well we could finally answer it...

Even worse, imagine Jerry Jones cryonics frozen face and brain being reattached to a body circa 2088. A la Ted Williams' head.....

The horror, the horror...

Don't laugh. Surely somewhere scientists are satisfying man's two deepest desires—the urge for sex and the urge to dominate. So we likely already have cloned prototype sex slaves and super soldiers in some Government lab stuck away somewhere sordid.

Remember they made that Scarlett Johansson clone in that strange sci-fi flick a few years back?

How bout a Corps of Infantry to go with the hard core honeys and the horses?

War and sex are the biggest businesses in the world. And business is growing...

Can sport be far behind?

As for me, the original boxers win. What clone Dempsey can match the real Dempsey's ferocity? I doubt it—despite all the clones long lab and road work.

And I'd bet Secretariat. Bring on the clones. Go Big Red...

But are the clones mere toys for sex, sport, and war?

Or will they have a Gene Upshaw clone labor leader?

Well that is a bit much even for Boxing, Blade Runner, and Horse Racing fans.

Cloning the ponies would be fun...the trick is how far to push it without becoming undone.

Here comes Cloney Da Pony around the Track and he is blowing away the competition! Go Cloney Da Pony Go! Eight to One...