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The Inspiration of John McEnroe

Robert OrzechowskiSep 13, 2009

Last night, Serena pulled a "John McEnroe" in her loss to Kim Clijsters in straight sets.  Serena has only been one of the latest to emulate the fiery former great.  Here are some other examples of the legacy of John McEnroe:

Any Public Service Transportation

Since McEnroe left the tour, the public transit system has never been the same

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Passenger puts change money for fare of bus/subway.

Driver:  Sorry sir, but that is $2.50 please.

Passenger: I PUT $2.50 IN!!

Driver:  Well, it looks to me that you only put in $1.75.  Please put in another .75.

Passenger:  LISTEN TO ME YOU SH**HEAD!  i PUT IN $2.50 AND I HAVE NO MORE CHANGE.

Driver:  Sir, I don't care for your abusive tone.  Either put in the complete fair or get off the bus.

Passenger: BUT I PAID YOU THE FARE YOU SCHMUCK, YOU POOR EXCUSE FOR A LIFE!

Driver:  That's it get off the bus!

Passenger:  OK fine but what about my money??

Driver: Get off the bus before I call the police!

Passenger: YOU STOLE MY MONEY YOU MOTHER^&%$#@*!!!!

Bus drives off leaving passenger fuming.

The Flintstones

Fred:  Hey Barney Boy, I need my mower back.  The grass is getting tall.

Barney: Hey sorry, Fred.  I am loaning it out to everyone down the block.  Making a pretty profit out of it too.  Ahee-hee-hee-hee-hee.

Fred:  Why you &*$% b*stard!!  You mean to tell me that the mower I gave you, you have been making money from?

Barney: Now easy, Fred. 

Fred: Don't you "easy Fred" me!  I am going to make you swallow my bowling ball whole, you lame excuse for a neanderthal!!

Fred curses and chases Barney down the street where the same background repeatedly goes by.

The Pope

Pope:  Call in Bishop Svengal.

Two cardinals bring in a defiant bishop.

Bishop Svengal: Your Holiness, I want to explain...

Pope:  THERE IS NOTHING TO EXPLAIN YOU SICK, PATHETIC HEATHEN.  YOU HAVE BLASPHEMED TO THE HEAVENS!

Bishop Svengali: Your Holiness, I had no idea that the couple I married were both men...

Pope: THEY WERE BOTH WEARING TUXEDOS YOU DIMWITTED MORON!!

Bishop: Your Holiness, I thought it was the new trend to make the wife a bit more..you know...modern.

Pope: Has it ever occurred to you that NOTHING in the Church is supposed to be "modern"?  Get your stink-infested tail out of Rome.  You are hereby ex-communicated!!

Bishop: Yes, Your Holiness...

Bishop goes to leave but the Pope orders him to halt.

Pope: Wait, you sh*thead!!! I am not done swearing at you yet, you dung-infested, rotting cesspool!  &^%$*!!!!!

Bishop: Anything else Your Holiness...

Pope: F * C K O F F!!!  You idiotic imbecile!!!

The Pope is calmed down by his two assistants as the Bishop is ushered away. 

President Obama

Obama:  Uh..Natasha, I believe it is your turn to take Bo out for a walk and you..uh have to....clean uh up the mess he made in the uh...Oval ..the Oval Office.

Sasha: Stick this puppy up your A**, Mr. President and my name is not Natasha, it's Sasha.  You do remember naming me, right?

Obama: Now uh Sasha.  You ...can call me Daddy and uh not ..uh Mr. President.

Sasha:  That's all I hear all day.  "Mr. President" this and "Mr. President" that.  It's all about you, isn't it Daddee!

Obama: uh...well...

Sasha: I am tired of waiting for you to finish your f***ing sentences and I am not taking Bo for a walk and I am not cleaning up his mess because it is not my f***ing turn!  Get Malia to do it.

Obama: Uh well Malia is on an overnight with her friends.

Sasha: So fine, sending the f***ing little puppy over there and let her do it.

Obama: Ok, um that is a good idea, I arrange to get the limo.

Aside from all these examples, McEnroe's legacy will continue to live on the hundreds of thousands of cases of road rage and any other incidents where spoiled brats use verbal abuse.  Long live McEnroe!

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