Good practice this morning man (hehe!).
Got some good news this morning. Leon told me that the Grizz are close to offering me a contract. He said that it was only a one-year, $3.5mil deal. While Leon didn't say it exactly, I'm pretty sure he meant to add that the offer will have an extra four or five years, player-option worth about $80-$100m. You know when you can just tell sometimes.
Leon's a kidder too, he once told me that Larry Brown would be happy to coach me again...in Charlotte! Yeah, and Paris Hilton's a movie star. Oh Leon, that one was worth your fee alone!
Anyhoo, I can't wait to start playing again, even if it is in Memphis. That city needs a hero. I heard that the Grizz partly want me just to help sell tickets though. What do they think, that I'm a scalper? That’s against the law, man.
Actually, I'm really looking forward to playing there. Man, I'm going to get sooooo many shots. None of the dudes there can score or shoot at all. I mean Rudy's ok but O.J. still counts as a rookie, don't he? It'll be his first year playing with me so that makes him a rook in my eye. Heck, I might even go for Wilt's record while I'm there. No, not that one, the other one, you know when he scored 100 points in a game.
Leon also told me that apart from the Grizz, it's only been the Clippers who have been serious about signing me so far. Leon just never stops with the one-liners. He obviously meant to say 'Lakers' but it sure did sound like 'Clippers' over the phone. Anyway, I'm cool with that, aside from than the Lakers, the Clippers are the biggest NBA team in L.A.
I mean look what they've done lately. Ok maybe last season wasn't so great, but that was a one-off. The other 25 seasons? Well, they were also just one-offs too. Isolated seasons which could have happened to any franchise.
Dunno what's so special about the Lakers anyway. Kobe has only won one ring without Shaq, people must be forgetting that I nearly won one with Todd MacCulloch.
Leon gave me one of those I-Phones the other day. That's my kind of phone. There ain't no team in iphone. It sounds to me like Apple are trying to use me to sell their phones now. I've been I-Verson my whole life and now this comes along. It's got heaps of applications that can do all sorts of cool stuff. Wonder if has a self destruct button?
I'm still shocked that I'm a free agent. Don't people know I'm only 34? Barry Bonds didn't start playing his best baseball until he was 34. Maybe I should have played baseball instead. I’d probably be pretty good at it.
Anyway, me to Memphis isn't a done deal yet (ok Leon, you got me...like I'm really going to Memphis!) but I'll play along just to keep you happy. Maybe their GM Chris is trying to work a sign-and-trade with the Pistons. Joe probably wants to try and get O.J. and Rudy for me. And fair enough too, that's about what I’m worth these days.
Alright, I gotta go tweet something nice about Memphis again...hope you’re following me, Leon!