Browns receiver Donte' Stallworth, who initially reacted to his one-year suspension via profane language on Twitter, has released a more traditional statement.
"Commissioner Goodell called me this morning," the statement reads. "Obviously, I am disappointed, but, as I said previously, I accept the Commissioner's decision. Regardless of the length of my suspension, I will carry the burden of Mr. Reyes' death for the rest of my life.
"I urge NFL fans not to judge NFL players or me based on my tragic lapse in judgment. I am a good person who did a bad thing. I will use the period of my suspension to reflect, fulfill my obligations, and use this experience to make a positive impact on the lives of those who look up to NFL players."
(So where's the part about watching "every f--kin game"?)
Obviously, Stallworth didn't write the statement. And if he wants anyone to believe that it reflects his current mindset, he probably should consider finding another hobby to replace his burgeoning Twitter habit.