Charles Barkley: Former NBA Star Running For Mayor?

Andrew AustinContributor IMay 15, 2008

The United States government is now on RED Alert as Hall of Fame Basketball Player and current TNT Analyst Charles Barkley is running for Mayor for the great historic town of Leeds, Ala.

Leeds, Alabama? I'm pretty sure the only thing Leeds, Alabama is famous for is...oh yeah, that's right, Sir Charles Barkley.

Big Chuckie broke the news to Jay Leno on a recent interview during the Tonight Show.

"I know I can do better than the people that are doing stuff there now." Barkley claimed. "We've got too many crooks on the City Council."

All right, big guy, you sound pretty motivated and excited about this. I get the impression that if you really put your mind to it, you can do anything. You can even raise your gambling debts to $400,000 and then tell Jay Leno, "Well, governor's down the line."

If I had to bet, oh let's say $400,000 on it, I would probably guess that the "crooks" in office in Leeds, Ala. don't have that much money owed to casinos, but that's just my opinion...I could be wrong.

The only thing that might be bigger than Barkley's mouth is the size of his Levi's. Let's not get it twisted here, folks. I love Charles' ridiculous comments and opinions as much as the next guy, but why in god's name are you running for Mayor?

Charlie...if you're seeking something fulfilling and rewarding, why don't you do the world a favor and just adopt a child from a Third World country like the rest of Hollywood... Angelina, Brad, Madonna... come on, man, get with the program. It's the cool thing to do nowadays.

His first order of business should be to lower the price of hamburgers and funnel cakes at the county fair. Okay, not quite, but you get the feeling that it's on his "To Do List." Other items include putting in a casino to fix his gambling addiction; tricking out the local ice cream truck; and making it slower so it's more convenient for him to track down.

I do not admire Charles Barkley, and I don't really know if many people should. However, I love to follow the silly things he does. The man is highly entertaining and has the best golf swing I have ever seen.