Julio Lugo, the Thorn in Every Red Sox Fan's Backside, Is Finally Plucked Out
Lugo is Gone, Lugo is Gone! Thank God Almighty, we are free at last!
For too long has the Nation suffered under the crippling disease known as Julio Lugo. Lugo may have possibly been the least liked player in Red Sox' history. Forget Buckner and his error, forget Gagne and his "not doing anything to help win a World Series", forget even the Bambino. Lugo was the dark mark upon all of our souls.
Tonight as I have promised many friends, I will celebrate the departure of Lugo from my beloved Sox. I am going to go so hard I will put the ewoks' rager from the end of Return of The Jedi to shame. Heralds shall write epic Norse poems about tonight that shall put Beowulf to shame. Thousands of years from now great men shall raise their glasses to July 17th, and remember. Remember how a team endured and thrived despite being stricken with the worst shortstop plague ever suffered.
I think the thing that will always stick out in my mind would be how Lugo found ways to blow games that wouldn't even show up on the stat line. How he would botch a double play from sheer lack of effort, then let a ball he should be able to get to pass though his left compounding his initial blunder. I honestly was hoping for Brad Penny to just turn around one time and severely beat Lugo. It looked like he was going to a couple of times.
I remember Lugo's own form of protest when he was removed from the leadoff spot. He ran himself out at third. It was the first time that I have ever seen Francona actually show anger to a player. I mean even Francona showed a distaste for Lugo. Francona would befriend and defend Genghis Khan if he was on the Red Sox bench.
Lugo just made it so easy not to like him. He whined about playing time when he was playing terrible. He was a wife beater. There weren't too many redeeming qualities to Lugo. Even winning a WS, people strongly disliked Lugo. Flashing a shot of Lugo on a TV in any bar in Boston would immediately destroy the mood. Lugo was like a constant sucker punch in the stomach.
Now Lugo can leave Boston with his ring and Boston shall rejoice. Celebrate brothers, for Lugo is no more.
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