Formula One: Quotes of Germany

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Formula One: Quotes of Germany
(Photo by Mark Thompson/Getty Images)

Continuing my regular feature of selecting the best quotes of the race weekend, come the end of the season I'll pick my favourite 10.

 

Saturday

 

Ferrari's Rob Smedley continues to give us some great team radio transmissions and qualifying was no different, we heard him shouting down the radio to Felpie Massa, “Stop, stop, stop, we've put the wrong tyres on!”

 

Maybe Smedley could do the voice over for the next Grolsch lager advert?

 

Rubens Barrichello is another guy after voice over work, he was asked, “You loved that session, didn't you?”

 

To which he replied “I did, I did. It was very, very nice...” Maybe Loony Tunes could use him?

 

"That session was madness but it was good fun. It's great for us to be in the top three!" Said Jenson Button, bet he wasn't saying that when the fuel weights were published.

 

Barrichello could also benefit from hindsight, “I'm happy for Mark for his pole position, he's a fun guy to work and play with.”

 

Play with? Oh you mean down into turn one when he is bumping you off the track?

 

Jenson Button proved the English love to talk about nothing more than the weather, “Twelve degrees in mid July, this is worse than England. Who says English weather is bad?”

 

Mark Webber wasn't even on the track for most of his Q2 lap form the sounds of it. “I had so many moments. At turn seven I was up with the spectators, in the last corner I was nearly in my hotel room, so I was all over the place and I didn't think I was through but the guys said I was fourth. I couldn't believe it.”

 

Webber though doesn't want to be visiting his hotel room during the race and just wants a procession to claim his maiden F1 win to go with his first pole, "I think a nice boring GP for me would be fantastic. We are ready for all conditions...”

 

All conditions Webbo? Remember lady luck hates you, she might cause a blizzard tomorrow now.

 

 

Sunday

 

Winners Team Radio

 

Mark Webber: “Woohoohoo ye ha you beauty, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yeah, yes, yes, yes, I did it (sobs whilst continuing to shout yes).”

 

That was one hell of an exuberant out pouring of emotion, but not as good as Button's “Monaco baby, yeah!”

 

Should of come out with, “Put me a shrimp on the barbie baby, daddy's a race winner!” Oh well I can but dream, speaking of dreams...

 

During Martin Brundle's BBC grid walk before the race he put it to Force India's Adrian Sutil, “I'm thinking of that time you had a Ferrari in your mirrors at Monaco last year and he ran you off the road, you've got two Ferrari's in your mirrors today.”

 

To which Sutil Replied “I think nobody wants to crash into my back, especially not from the Ferrari guys, I have a good feeling there.”

 

Martin Brundle went on, “What would be a satisfactory result for you today, what would you be happy with?”

 

Sutil replied, “I would say a top 10 finish would be really good, maybe one point a little dream.”

 

Nobody trust Sutil next time he gets a good feeling then, as Raikkonen went and did exactly what Martin Brundle was concerned about and put his Ferrari into Sutil's Force India again!

 

What makes it worse is he has destroyed Sutil's, “little dream” damn those overly aggressive Finns!

 

After claiming his maiden win Mark Webber has a tougher challenge to face: "The big problem at our factory at the moment is building a big enough trophy cabinet!”

 

I hate it when that happens, all that silverware and no where to put it but a draw. Though I think Webber has an even more immediate problem, “I moved across and then what made it worse was that I shitted myself and came back across again and I thought 'My God, there he [Barrichello] is.'”

 

No wonder Vettel looked so peeved in the press conference, Mark Webber was stinking the place out with his dirty underwear!

 

Rubens Barrichello was trying his hardest to keep his race seat for next year, by bigging the team up for all their efforts, “I did all I could but they made me lose the race basically. I feel sorry for myself," said the Brazilian.

 

However he couldn't keep his mouth shut and had more praise continuing, “To be honest, I wish I could just go straight on the plane and go home. I don't want to talk to anyone in the team because I don't want to understand. All it will be from them is blah, blah blah."

 

All we ever hear from you Rubens is 'blah, blah, blah', you really are becoming a grumpy old man who keeps making excuses, I think you may have even over taken Alonso in the grumpy whiner stakes.

 

Meanwhile Barrichello's team mate Button had the right attitude, "...we've got to kick some arse in Hungary, and that's what we're going to try and do.”

 

Button though did sneak a little dig in for Barrichello, “We could shout at the team about improving things, but they know what they've got to do.”

 

So to the Hungaroring to see this 'arse kicking', 'til then, I bid you adieu!

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