Pepe's 10 Most Shameful Moments
In the great pantheon of violent, obtuse, irrational and terrifying footballers, one name rises above all else: Pepe.
The Real Madrid star has landed himself in hot water during Los Blancos' pre-season tour of the United States, by helping to make a friendly with Roma a little less friendly.
That skirmish with Seydou Keita leads our list of Pepe's most shameful moments...
Spitting at Seydou Keita
During Real Madrid's friendly with Roma in Dallas this week, Seydou Keita refused to shake hands with Pepe, and proceeded to start a small brawl when he threw a bottle of water at the Portuguese star.
Why the bad feeling? Well, as per RFI (h/t Marca), Keita alleges that Pepe called him a "monkey", with The Guardian source above detailing accusations of racism made against Pepe by Keita following a Supercup Clasico in 2011.
During the melee in Texas, it also transpired that Pepe spat at his accuser.
His World Cup Red Card
Portugal didn't exactly enjoy a vintage World Cup, and they started very badly with a 4-0 loss to the Germans.
As Thomas Mueller sat on the ground reeling from a Pepe challenge, the red mist descended on the Portuguese centre-back as he approached the Bayern Munich forward and butted heads with him.
It wasn't the hardest clash of heads ever seen in the game, but seeing as Mueller was quietly sitting on the ground, it might have been the stupidest.
His Verbal Abuse of a Referee
After a 1-1 draw with Villarreal in March 2012 in which Real Madrid finished with nine men (amazingly, Pepe stayed in the field), our man confronted referee Jose Luis Paradas Romero after the game to express his disgust.
According to a report from Reuters, the official match report reveals Pepe stopped the referee in the tunnel and accused him of "robbery."
He received a two-match ban for his troubles.
His Cesc Fabregas 'Headbutt'
During a highly entertaining Clasico in March 2014, Pepe confronted Barcelona's Cesc Fabregas in the goalmouth.
The pair appeared to have a heated discussion at close quarters before Pepe gave the Spaniard's forehead a nudge with his own.
Apparently, the contact was enough to make both men collapse in agony on the floor. Neither player ended up covering themselves in glory here.
His Constant Diving
For a man with one of the toughest reputations in the game, Pepe really does go down incredibly easily.
There are numerous examples of his attempts to illegitimately win a free kick on YouTube, including the unconvincing dive above. What makes it worse is that he kicks team-mate Alvaro Arbeloa during his theatrics.
His Stamp on Lionel Messi
During a very heated Copa del Rey Clasico in January 2012, Pepe was accused of intentionally stamping on Lionel Messi's hand.
The angry defender received widespread condemnation for the incident, but it wasn't spotted by any of the officials. He insisted the stamp was not intentional and subsequently was given no punishment.
Kicking Lionel Messi in the Face
Pepe may have given Leo Messi a sore hand in 2012, but the previous year he gave him a sore head.
During a Clasico encounter in April 2011, he appeared to strike the Argentinean superstar in the head during a challenge. This might be explained away as an accident, but it did nothing for his reputation.
His Rude Gestures to Barcelona Fans
When Real Madrid scored during a 2011 Clasico at the Camp Nou, Pepe celebrated the best way he knew how: A very rude hand gesture to the home fans.
Based on the contents of this list, it's probably fair to say that Pepe isn't too popular in Catalunya.
His Coolio Hair
During Real Madrid's recent friendlies in the USA, Pepe has been sporting his traditional menacing shaved head look.
However, he actually turned up in the States paying tribute to rap legend Coolio, before making the wise decision to trim it all off.
This hair crime might be the most shameful thing on this entire list.
His Animalistic Rampage Against Getafe
Pepe's most shocking moment of utter mindlessness came in April 2009 during a Spanish Primera tie with Getafe.
With the score level at 2-2 in the dying minutes, Pepe brought down Javier Casquero in the area. He then proceeded to kick his opponent in the back twice, before shoving his head into the turf and stamping on him.
On his way off the field, he also took a swing at Getafe's Juan Angel Albin.
It was an incredible loss of control that resulted in a 10-match ban.