Ron Artest As a Muppet... By John 'Fatty'-Fatland , Correspondent Jul 4, 2009 Share Tweet Next ARTICLE » Use your ← → (arrow) keys to browse more stories (Photo by Ronald Martinez/Getty Images) 2.0K Reads 12 Comments Did you happen to see Ron Artest's ESPN interview after he agreed to sign with the Lakers? That dude was 'hyper excited' to be a Lakers. So hyper in fact, he could hardly contain his emotions. And looks to me, he is afflicted with R.A.D.D. "Ron's Attention Deficit Disorder". How bad does Ron have this unique affliction only peculiar to him? Its soo bad, I think he will do anything to win a Lakers Championship. Even BEFORE he was a Lakers, he was eager to 'win one for the Kobester', when he visited naked Kobe, in the shower, after the Lakers loss to Boston. "Kobe, I will do everything in my power to help you win a Title." An obvious R.A.D.D. moment How bad does Ron Artest want another Lakers Championship? How much will he dedicate himself to the effort? More than the hardest working player in the NBA, Kobe? If the shower incident is any indicator, he might just top Kobe's famous work ethic. And if that's the case, he should certainly be rewarded with his own Muppet comercial in my book. So this is the Muppet commercial, I would like to see. Here's the setting: Muppet Ron Artest is showing up at Kobe’s place at four in the morning. Ron is ringing the doorbell over and over again, as Kobe now opens the door half-asleep. Picture Ron as the obnoxious, pesky kid. “Cmon Kobe, let’s go work out!” “Its 4 AM Ron!” “Yeah, I know, sorry I’m late, but we got a Championship to win, and you know what they say, “The early bird gets the Title! Right Kobe, right Kobe!” In the background, we hear LeBron yell out. “Who’s at the door Kobe?! Its the middle of the night!” “It's nobody LeBron. go back to bed!” “Hey Kobe, if LeBron wants to work out, he can come too. That would be fun. We’d be the Three Amigos. That sounds really nice Kobe. Uh Kobe?! Uh Kobe?!” “That’s okay Ron, he don’t usually wake up 'till 10. And today, he’s meeting Shaq at Dunkin Donuts” “Hey Kobe, Kobe, what you say after we lift weights we go down to El Segundo and play some one on one, followed by some three on three at UCLA. Ooh! Ooh! Kobe, I got a better idea. Let’s form a team and go to Las Vegas and play some in the NBA Summer League” “Ron, Ron….” (Kobe shaking his head in disapproval) “Kobe, Kobe, get this, We call ourselves, ‘The Brothers from LA’. That way, everyone knows we family now!” “Ron, Ron…..I’m not even dressed!……. “That’s okay Kobe, you can change in the car. We can’t waste time, because every second counts when you are trying to win a Championship. Right Kobe?! Right Kobe?! “And Kobe, I got a real good idea, real good one. How about, I move in with you all? Then we can talk basketball ALL the time” Kobe rolls his eyes wondering, what am I in for? Author's note: If Ron-Ron puts in the effort he is capable of and follows through on his R.A.D.D. enthusiasm with earnest committment. Good results may follow for the Lakers and him. Its going to be an interesting season, for sure.