Gather round all my Windy City chic-a-dees
As this homegrown Sports scandal grows
The story of the rookie who cheated in school
We present an evening with Derrick Rose
His talent put the world at his finger tips
A Superstar he was born to be
And he’s here to prove that he’s much more than
A dude who cheated on his S.A.T.
Was your coach as tense as he looked?
That dude was so nervous he paced the sideline
with his hands in his pockets while biting his nails.
Hey D-Rose, what do you think of this scandal?
Man, it will look great with a pedicure.
Wheat is to bread as tomato is to....
A story more tragic than Hamlet
The more he speaks we see the less he knows…
Another Chicago Sports Icon down the crapper…
It's the sad, sad ballad of Derrick Rose…