An Evening With Derrick Rose

Trish VignolaContributor IJune 29, 2009

BOSTON - MAY 02:  Derrick Rose #1 of the Chicago Bulls drives to the net as Rajon Rondo #9 of the Boston Celtics defends in Game Seven of the Eastern Conference Quarterfinals during the 2009 NBA Playoffs at TD Banknorth Garden on May 2, 2009 in Boston, Massachusetts. The Celtics defeated the Bulls 109-99. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this photograph, User is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement.  (Photo by Elsa/Getty Images)

Gather round all my Windy City chic-a-dees

As this homegrown Sports scandal grows

The story of the rookie who cheated in school

We present an evening with Derrick Rose

 

His talent put the world at his finger tips

A Superstar he was born to be

And he’s here to prove that he’s much more than

A dude who cheated on his S.A.T.

 

Was your coach as tense as he looked?

 

That dude was so nervous he paced the sideline

with his hands in his pockets while biting his nails.

 

Hey D-Rose, what do you think of this scandal?

 

Man, it will look great with a pedicure.

 

Wheat is to bread as tomato is to....

 

Err...No Comment...

 

 

A story more tragic than Hamlet

The more he speaks we see the less he knows…

Another Chicago Sports Icon down the crapper…

It's the sad, sad ballad of Derrick Rose…