Looking for Job Security? Try NBA GM!

Eli FuchsContributor IApril 29, 2008

As I sit at work and listen to all of my bosses tell me how to do my job better I fall into a daydream about the ideal job.  Of course, I have devoted half of my years on this earth to Chicago sports.  I yearn for the days of Chicago Stadium rocking at the sound of the PA system telling me that #23 is MIIICHAEL Jorrdan!

Of course, after Mike started rocking the wrong jersy(Wizards) I woke up to Chicago Stadium got its name changed to United Center and the shaking bleachers barely vibrate.  The screaming fans became employees begging for money for the 50/50 raffle.  So I digress and wonder how did this all happen? What happened to the 5 year rebuilding plan?  Who is responsible?

Players? Sure they quit on both coaches last season, but were they given the proper pieces to complete the puzzle?  Coaches? Sure they failed to create a cohesive team but again where was that low-post scoring when the shooters were off? Then, as if the fog cleared I saw the man with the best job security in basketball appear.  John Paxson, who once received the applause and cheers from the Bulls faithful now haunt those same fan's in their sleep. 

When did Ben Gordon and Luol Deng become better than Kobe Bryant?  How did Ben Wallace and Joe Smith become the low post scoring answers?  How does John Paxson still have his job? 

Sure the Bulls made a nice run in the 2007 Playoffs by sweeping a sloppy Miami Heat team.  And then salvaging a no-chance series against a well put together Detroit Pistons team.  I remember a smile barely creeping onto the face of Joe Dumars because he finally got his revenge on John Paxson and the Bulls. 

John Paxson's GM resume includes nixing trades for Kobe Bryant and Kevin Garnett both of whom have led their teams to the 1st place seeds currently.  Both of whom are MVP candidates. 

I then realized that Seinfeld is oh so right.  When George wore Babe Ruth's jersey to a front office meeting and wiped his strawberry filled hands on the jersey, he then received a raise.  Then George took a World Series trophy and drove it around the parking lot while attached to the back of his car.  He was then applauded for "shaking things up."  Good job George, that's what we needed!

Well let me be the first to thank John for nixing those trades, denying Pau Gasol a chance to play on a winning team in the East.  I want to be able to savour the memories of the Chicago Championships, I don't want to experience them anymore!

Kudos to you John Paxson and I can't wait until RC Buford steps down as Spurs GM because my resume is ready and I cannot wait to turn down offers for Michael Beasley and Derrick Rose in the future!

 Here I come Alamo!