If you ask delinquents in a junior high detention hall and your Great Aunt Pam what they think about the movie Happy Gilmore, you're likely to get two wildly different answers.
So, in developing an ordered list of the 101 greatest sports movies ever, one must first find a person with discernible taste and an eagle eye for finding the truth.
Ladies and gentlemen, when it comes to inspiring a win with "new uniforms!" or timeworn stories about underdogs, I am a bona fide expert.
And today, I offer my services. You're welcome.
The following list is a carefully curated ranking of movies that feature sports as a main element in the storyline. Films that are rife with cliches or use athletics as a crutch instead of a pillar are ranked lower, while objectively awesome sports films rank towards the top.
Easy enough? Good. Now, update your Netflix queue accordingly.
Note: ESPN's "30 for 30" series is not included because those pieces are pretty good and, consequently, would infest this list like flawlessly edited cockroaches.