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40 Crazy Super Bowl Commercials You Totally Forgot About

Nick DimengoFeatured ColumnistJanuary 30, 2014

40 Crazy Super Bowl Commercials You Totally Forgot About

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    Crystal LoGiudice-USA TODAY Sports

    Regardless of football allegiances, there are very few things that people choose to do on Super Bowl Sunday other than watch the big game.

    And while your buddies might be talking smack about players or big-time plays, there's a second competition going on in the meantime: discovering which advertiser cooked up the best commercial.

    As we've seen with each Super Bowl, the ads sometimes outweigh the game. That's why I'm giving you 40 ads that you may have forgotten about, most of which were absolutely terrible.

Ameriquest (Super Bowl XL)

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    It's not that this commercial isn't clever; it actually warranted a smirk from me.

    What makes this so crazy is that it has absolutely nothing to do with the company that spent gobs of money to advertise during the big game.

    Beer, I can see. But not a mortgage company.

Coca-Cola (Super Bowl XLVI)

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    These white polar bears are a staple for Coca-Cola during the winter months, so it makes sense to feature them during the Super Bowl, too.

    It's too bad that this commercial happened to strike out big time. The only action one of them does is "Arghh" in frustration.

    Dumb? I'd say so.

Groupon (Super Bowl XLV)

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    This one caught serious heat from media and viewers because of its insensitivity toward Tibetan people.

    Normally, I'm the type of person to remind everyone to just let loose and have some fun.

    In this case, though, the ad isn't even clever. Groupon failed all over the place here.

7 Up (Super Bowl XXXIII)

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    Before Mountain Dew tried to get in with hip kids who didn't conform, 7 Up attempted it first.

    Does anyone else do anything but roll his or her eyes after watching this one?

    It's just stupid.

Bud Light (Super Bowl XXXII)

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    Bud Light usually does a knockout job of hitting on all of its Super Bowl commercials.

    This one from back in 1998, though? Not so much.

    People might love animals doing human things, but this one should have gotten fried.

Chevrolet (Super Bowl XLVI)

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    Way to depress millions of people around the world, Chevy.

    I get the idea, but this is one of the dumbest commercials I've ever seen.

    Looks like the human race is dependent on these few guys who chose the longest lasting truck on the planet.

    Good grief.

H&M (Super Bowl XLVI)

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    H&M nailed it by choosing the Animals song, "Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood," for this commercial. Why? Because I have no idea what's going on.

    Sure, ladies all over the world likely loved seeing soccer star David Beckham pose shirtless. But there's no way in hell any guy rushed to buy his underwear line after seeing this commercial.

AT&T (Super Bowl XXX)

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    I may not be a marketing whiz, but no one likes a lot of talking in a Super Bowl commercial.

    Why AT&T went that route with this ad from Super Bowl XXX is beyond me.

Miller Lite (Super Bowl XXXI)

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    You know that embarrassed feeling you get when watching something that's just absolutely ridiculous? When you actually feel bad for those who are in front of the camera?

    Yeah, that just about sums up this Miller Lite commercial.

Outpost.com (Super Bowl XXXII)

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    This seems like a classic case of a company just spending money to create some buzz.

    Unfortunately, the millions Outpost.com spent to fire gerbils at a wall didn't seem to help business. The commercial got negative press, and the company itself changed its name—now going by frys.com.

TaxAct.com (Super Bowl XLVI)

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    This commercial for filing taxes used an element that usually hits with viewers—bathroom humor and kids—but, in this case, the message drowned in the pool featured in the ad.

    It feels more like a local commercial than one that a company spent millions on to run during the biggest event of the year.

Bud Light (Super Bowl XLVI)

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    I'm not sure what makes me more upset about this Bud Light commercial from Super Bowl XLVI—the fact that the beer itself is terrible, or that the company puts it on a pedestal as if it's the best brew ever created.

    It's fitting that the song "Runaway" is featured, because that's what I want to do every time I see this ad.

McDonald's (Super Bowl XXIV)

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    Simply put—boring.

    Did anyone in the world really care about these people from Alaska and whom they were cheering for in Super Bowl XXIV?

    It's doubtful, which is why it's perplexing that this commercial ever got mentioned as a pitch.

GoDaddy (Super Bowl XLIV‎)

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    Sex sells.

    That's the theory that GoDaddy ran with in this one. It not only shows off a bunch of attractive girls in skimpy outfits, but also features NASCAR driver Danica Patrick talking about her "enhancements."

    Did this actually trick people into going to the website? Sadly, it probably did.

E*Trade (Super Bowl XLI)

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    In its own words, online investing site E*Trade admitted to wasting $2 million on one of the dumbest Super Bowl ads ever aired.

    The blatant attempt at irony just ended up being an awful financial decision.

    And these guys want us to trust them with our dough?

Burger King (Super Bowl XX)

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    It turned out that the reception of "Herb the Nerd" wasn't as successful as Burger King had first hoped. The company pulled the ads only a few months after unveiling the thick-framed character during Super Bowl XX.

    Seems like no one really cared about finding Herb.

SoBe (Super Bowl XLII)

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    What happens when you pair an attractive model with computer-generated, dancing lizards shaking it to a classic Michael Jackson song?

    A terrible commercial, as SoBe demonstrated during Super Bowl XLII.

Sierra Mist (Super Bowl XXXVIII)

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    While Patton Oswalt earns a shout-out for making an appearance in this ad, everything else about it is a miss.

    The whole bit of a guy wearing a kilt to cool himself off only works if...oh, wait, it never does.

    Just stick to letting fans decide between Sierra Mist and 7 Up at the grocery store rather than turn them off by filming this garbage.

SalesGenie.com (Super Bowl XLII)

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    In all honesty, this SalesGenie.com ad could have been much higher on my list, given the fact that the company openly used it to win back the crown of the worst Super Bowl ad ever.

    It gives a great effort in that regard by featuring some racist pandas that turned millions of people off.

GoDaddy (Super Bowl XLVII)

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    This GoDaddy ad doesn't make my list because of the reasons other people believe it to be an awful commercial.

    Is it a bit raunchy? Yeah.

    Does it objectify women? Definitely.

    But more than anything, I'm just jealous that this dude got to make out with supermodel Bar Refaeli 60 times to make sure they got it right.

    That's something everyone should be upset about.

Bud Light (Super Bowl XXXVII)

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    I am absolutely terrified of clowns.

    So when Bud Light thought that featuring one in a bar would be a good idea, and then thought it would be funny to have it drink a brew with its costume upside down, it just made me dislike clowns even more.

    The YouTube title might claim this as "the funniest ever," but in this case, the Internet is lying.

Pepsi (Super Bowl XLVI)

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    There's just too much going on in this Pepsi commercial to enjoy anything that's going on.

    Sure, the company may have dropped some serious coin to get a mega-star like Elton John and a B-lister like Flavor Flav to star in it.

    Unfortunately, that doesn't mean the finished product is going to be a hit.

Blackberry (Super Bowl XLVII)

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    Maybe I'm reading into this way too much, but does this Blackberry commercial just seem lazy to anyone else?

    Rather than tell us what the phone can actually do, Blackberry uses the 30-second ad "to show what the phone can't do."

    Since most people aren't expecting their phones to substitute as a fire extinguisher, this goes down as a swing and a miss.

McDonald's (Super Bowl IX)

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    Two all-beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions on a sesame seed bun.

    Now that's not too difficult to say—and I've never even had a Big Mac.

    Apparently, though, it was too difficult for these McDonald's customers, making the fast food giant seem unrecognizable. That's not a great take-home message to give viewers on the biggest night of the year.

Holiday Inn (Super Bowl XXXI)

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    I hope no one really liked this Holiday Inn commercial that featured a transgender woman who underwent a transition before a class reunion.

    Why?

    Since it never aired again, Super Bowl XXXI was the one time to see it.

    It's too bad the hotel chain didn't spend some of that $2 billion on hiring a better ad agency to film its commercial.

General Motors (Super Bowl XLI)

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    This GM commercial from Super Bowl XLI is just one of the worst ever.

    No robot should ever be portrayed as being depressed—unless it's in an animated Disney movie.

Samsung (Super Bowl XLVII)

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    Samsung thought that getting a few comedians to poke fun at the trademarking of the words "Super Bowl" would pay off.

    The irony of it is that it's just not funny.

    With Paul Rudd and Seth Rogen at the company's disposal, this is the best it could do?

    Poor effort, so I'll stick with my iPhone.

Norwegian Cruise Line (Super Bowl XXVIII)

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    If ever there was a Super Bowl commercial made for taking a bathroom break, this Norwegian Cruise Line ad would be it.

    Filmed in black and white with a ton of text that relies upon viewers actually paying attention, there is no reason why this commercial should have ever made it past the drawing board.

Noxzema (Super Bowl VII)

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    New York Jets Hall of Fame quarterback Joe Namath may have some regrets in life, but I'd imagine that muttering the words "I'm gonna get creamed" in this Super Bowl ad for Noxzema would be close to the top.

    Even with All-American girl Farrah Fawcett doing the creaming, it's still absolutely ridiculous.

Skechers (Super Bowl XLV)

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    A lot of people think that Kim Kardashian is only famous because she's both rich and really, really attractive.

    So what better way to prove that there's more to her than to feature her being shallow while wearing next to nothing? Oh, wait.

    Kim may look sexy in this ad, but the reality is that she's trying to sell Skechers. Who thinks Skechers are ever going to be sexy?

Dirt Devil (Super Bowl XXXI)

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    Sadly, Dirt Devil takes one of former actor Fred Astaire's most famous scenes ever and turns it into something that's forgettable, to say the least.

    Congratulations to the vacuum company for earning scorn for doing just that.

Lifeminders.com (Super Bowl XXXIV)

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    Lifeminders.com called itself out for having the "worst commercial on the Super Bowl," but even its light jab didn't intrigue viewers enough to check the site out.

    Proof of that came shortly after this ad aired, when the company's VP of marketing called it quits.

Century 21 (Super Bowl XLVII)

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    I might like eating hot dogs at a tailgate, but I really hate this commercial.

    It isn't nearly as funny as Century 21 hoped. Although the premise of it is admirable, I don't get why it didn't use something that actually dealt with real estate.

    All this does is remind me to be careful while scarfing down a hot dog.

Foot Locker (Super Bowl XXI)

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    If this is the future of sports, I really hope I'm not around to see the future.

    With a Rollerball-like game going on and some super trippy effects popping up at random times, I'd think the people of Foot Locker were on drugs while writing up this ad.

Just for Feet (Super Bowl XXXIII)

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    You may be asking yourself, "What's so wrong with this commercial?" after watching it a few times.

    Um, isn't it obvious? (Hello, racism!)

    On top of lacking any real substance, the ad got completely wiped off the face of the Earth because of the bad press it received. That's how you know it's awful.

Nuveen Investments (Super Bowl XXXIV)

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    It's always tricky trying to portray just what the future might look like in a 60-second spot.

    And, unfortunately for Nuveen Investments, the ad it ran during Super Bowl XXXIV didn't quite come across as acceptable.

    Featuring former actor Christopher Reeve walking—he suffered an accident years earlier that left him paralyzed—the ad only makes people wonder what the whole point of it was.

Snickers (Super Bowl XLI)

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    As a veteran of Super Bowl Sunday, Snickers should probably know better than to bend the rules.

    Sure, its Super Bowl XLI ad was certainly meant to be humorous and not create controversy, but thanks to tons of complaints from different human-rights groups, it had to be pulled for being too distasteful.

Gillette (Super Bowl III)

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    Note to anyone who sees his razor talking to him as this ad shows—either lay off the extracurricular activities, or grow a beard.

    Did Gillette want to market its products to kids in the form of a Saturday morning cartoon character or to men watching the Super Bowl?

    Watching this commercial makes me wonder.

Atari (Super Bowl XVIII)

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    Alan Alda might have been a big star during the mid-80s from his role on the TV show M-A-S-H, but I don't care if Atari had picked a supermodel to film this commercial—I don't want to have a tutorial of how to plug the thing in.

    Seriously, that's all this commercial is: Alda unwrapping and hooking up his Atari.

Gatorade (Super Bowl XLII)

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    I still can't believe a company that made its mark with such commercials as the "Be Like Mike" campaign could make something as awful as this.

    It's a damn dog, drinking something—perceived to be Gatorade—from its bowl.

    Yes, that's all it is, making it the craziest Super Bowl commercial in history because of how pathetic it is.

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