Oh sure, he brings you presents, but that Santa Claus guy eats your cookies, drinks your milk and delivers a stress fracture to your lower back.
Naughty list indeed.
One part of the report mentions how he hopes to stay with the Mets. He offers, "I want to be in New York. Hopefully my best baseball is ahead of me. I’ve been a part of the problem, so you want to be part of the solution."
Fantastic sentiment, ol' chap. However, you better get on the first taxi out of town.
Ackert also reminds fans of the Santa Curse, which has hobbled and derailed many a fine Met in the past and supposedly started with Mike Cameron in 2004.
It begins with a player wearing the Santa suit for the organization's holiday party for schoolchildren, something Murphy did on Tuesday.
Here he is with Zack Wheeler, via MLB on Fox.
That should be enough to guarantee Murphy is either traded or struck down on the streets of Manhattan by a group of crazed, flying reindeer.
MLB Blogs' Anthony DiComo served as curse historian in his own article, chronicling each instance of Mets mishaps.
Read for yourself about scary coincidences like Kris Benson showing up with his then-wife Anna Benson, only to get traded a month later.
In 2010, David Wright showed up as the jolly ol' fat guy for a second time, and he then suffered a stress fracture to his lower back just a few months later.
Coincidence? Sure, but golly that is intriguing.
John Maine, Mike Pelfrey and others were unable to skirt the curse. Heck, R.A. Dickey merely made a "cameo" in 2012 and look what happened to him.
If you wait long enough, a team down in the dumps and players mired in lackluster performance will look back and blame it all on some curse. I'm sure the Kansas City Royals have an overcooked brisket they would love to finger as a scapegoat.
However, some sports curses already give superstitious athletes pause. Some NFL stars are surely thinking twice about lending their likeness to the cover of the annual Madden video game—the most famous and well-documented curse.
Murphy would rather scoff at such silliness with the rest of you cynics, because he has already donned the red cap and coat.
As DiComo reminds us, Murphy played the part back in 2011 after already undergoing a knee injury. To that end, the player chimed in with, "You’re lucky if you get through 162 games without going on the DL. I’ve (played Santa) before," via the New York Daily News.
That's all well and good, but perhaps the team should let a bullpen catcher play Santa from here on out.
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