When players descend on Mankato in just a few short months, so will the fans, the curious, and the Press. Given the chance to spend time asking any player, anything, I'd sidle up to Jared Allen, take him to my favorite cowboy honky-tonk, buy him a sarsaparilla and pick his brain with the following questions.
You're a cowboy and having grown up in TX and OK, I admire that. How do you satisfy your inner cowboy when you are far from the rodeo, deep in the MN cold and surrounded by guys, not in chaps, but in shoulder pads?
People, especially women, love your bigger-than-life personality. Yet at the same time, there is an absence of the Prima-Donna about you. You love the crowd, you are the only player I have seen come over consistently before almost every game and sign autographs for those lucky fans on the field. How do you land, what was at the time, the largest defensive contract in NFL history and still manage to be remarkably humble and approachable?
You've stated that at the age of 8, you decided you wanted to be drafted by the NFL. That's a big dream a lot of us can us can identify with but not one just anyone can pursue. Besides talent, what or whom do you credit (besides yourself) with encouraging that dream and helping you realize it?
Besides recommending facial hair and a mullet as a way to intimidate an opponent, what would you recommend, especially for those of us who, through age or gender, can't fulfill the facial hair part?
What intimidates Jared Allen?
With the contract you have and the 8 million dollar roster bonus due to you next year, are you still planning on driving that baby blue caddy with the longhorns on it?
You're a calf-roper and also compete in reining, and you're calf-roping pantomime is your signature move after a sack. If you could really calf-rope any opponent, who would it be and why?
I see you're watching the game on the T.V. over my head, which is weird because I have never had a man do that when I was engaged in conversation with him, so I'll wrap up with one final question: Who's gonna win the Superbowl?
Thank you, Mr. Allen, for your time. We now proceed to our regularly scheduled program.