Rod Serling emerges from the Zamboni tunnel's darkness at Joe Louis Arena and begins his trademark pull on a Lucky Strike, breathily oozing mystery with every wince.
"What's a weirder NHL playoff scenario?" he ponders with perfect diction.
"The great Scotty Bowman, who needs one more ring to have one for each of his ten fingers, returning to Detroit with the Chicago Blackhawks and dishes all his Red Wing secrets to beat the defending Cup champions?"
The wisps of smoke curl around his granite face. He squints those beady black eyes.
"Or Dan Bylsma, former Mighty Duck and now rookie head coach of the Pittsburgh Penguins, who gets to the Stanley Cup Finals and beats his former Ducks coach Mike Babcock, making a re-match of last year's Finals?"
Sounds like a weird TV script, but one of them could happen!
When Bowman recently left the Wings to work with his son and the Chicago Blackhawks, he left with Mike Illitch's blessing. Not in a million pizzas did the Wings' owner ever think it might come back to bite him in his pepperoni.
Such is the case after last night when the Wings sent the Ducks searching for tee times in southern California and now await the Blackhawks arrival in Detroit on Sunday.
And weirdy number two is no less bizarre after the Pittsburgh Penguins arranged the same recreation for Ovechkin's comrades only days before.
If Bylsma's Boys beat the pesky Canes, and Detroit solves Scotty's magic, Bylsma would face his Mighty Mentor, Mike Babcock. I haven't looked it up, but if Dan beats Babcock he might be the youngest coach to win the Stanley Cup at 38.
If not the youngest, then certainly the one newest to the elite job having had the role for only three months. If he wins the Cup surely that would be a record!
As a Wings' fan, I'm pulling for the them to repeat.
As a friend of Dan, which is an honor because he is truly deserving and a fine man, I'm hoping he gets to Game Seven against the Wings...and...and...and...they play forever!
Life is stranger than fiction!