Washington Capitals: Why I Need Them to Win Game Seven

Erin Newsome by Contributor Written on May 13, 2009
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This article was originally going to be titled “What the Caps Need to Win Game Seven.”  

I started to write about a team’s desire to win a cup you’ve never held being stronger than a team’s desire to win another. 

Then something happened.  The “whats” turned into “why's.”  

That’s when it became all about me. 

The following are selections from a very long list of reasons why "I" need the Caps to win Game Seven:

No. 87—I listen to “Don’t Stop Believin’” on repeat all day, every day.

No. 52—I have taken to posting on message boards begging anyone who has a Mike Green signed, Easton Stealth stick to lend it back to him.

No. 39—My refrigerator is empty. I haven’t been to the grocery store in two weeks because, why buy food that you can’t eat?

No. 28—I weigh eight pounds.

No. 25—My Facebook friend population is dwindling due to boredom from constant Caps status updates.

No. 21—While asleep, my husband’s wrist twitches in such a way that he must be flicking a wicked wrister in his dreams—indicating to me that the tortures of not being in control of an outcome also haunts his dreams.

No. 19—Out of necessity for survival, my cat developed opposable thumbs and has taken to feeding herself and cleaning her own litter.  

No. 17—It has only just occurred to me that the science community might be interested in No. 19.

No. 8—Whenever I hear music, I edit an Ovechkin highlight reel in my own head.

No. 3—The dark circles under my eyes are visible from space.

And the No. 1 reason why I need the Caps to win Game Seven—My love for this team has left my life in shambles and I’m addicted to the pain.

Whatever your favorite hockey team, chances are there are a lot of you out there tonight whose last fortnight could be summed up in much the same way as mine.

Most things in life are unpredictable, one thing is certain—I will shed tears at Verizon Center tonight, no matter the result.

 

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written on May 13, 2009 Humor

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