Chicago Cubs

The Wrigleyville Trixie: An Elegy Part 2

CHICAGO - APRIL 15: Fans of the Chicago Cubs cheer in the right field bleachers during a game between the Cubs and the Colorado Rockies on April 15, 2009 at Wrigley Field in Chicago, Illinois. The Rockies defeated the Cubs 5-2. (Photo by Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images)
Trish VignolaContributor IMay 9, 2009

The rosters at home plate they exchanged,

“THIS is our year” we all pray

But as she sits, we see that nothing has changed

The Wrigleyville Trixie – An Elegy.

Calling the Brewers fan in front of him a fag,

She don’t realize a husband, he’ll never be.

Who could miss her beau the flip-flop wearing douche bag.

Looking tired is the faux tan wearing Trixie.

Lilly, Soto, Fukudome, Zambrano

But you’re taking pictures of your boobs, oh gee.

Heilman, Theriot, Dempster, Soriano

Please don’t post this stuff on Facebook, Wrigleyville Trixie!

Her douche keeps asking me if this is section 209.

As I desperately try to follow this game.

If you just let me stab him with this spork I’ll be fine.

It’s amazing.  The more things change the more they stay the same.

Focused less on the game than their tan,

By the 7th, they're as buzzed as can be.

So they move to the club of named for their hero Captain Morgan.

Goodbye to you and your douche, Wrigleyville Trixie.


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