15 Things Only West Coast Sports Fans Will Appreciate
Sorry, but you East Coast sports fans just wouldn't understand.
Step into my world for a second as we embark on sunshine and beach balls, early tailgate times and Mount Davis glory. Yes, we will talk about the good and bad that come with being a West Coast sports fan.
Of course, this is far from an all-encompassing breakdown of every single aspect that differentiates the West Coast experience.
I would love to hear what you think are the biggest differences between this part of the sports world and everywhere else.
Now let's break down our dirty little secrets.
No Snow Days
How's that snow working out for you?
Yes, I know it rains roughly every single minute up in Seattle, but they are fond of reminding us they love the precipitation, which is obviously a lie.
Either way, one of the greatest feelings is going to a college football or NFL game late in the year wearing shorts and tailgating without the fear of hypothermia.
I will admit, games played in the snow do look better on TV. Now let me repeat; they look better on TV.
USC Is the Worst, and the Best
Yes, I understand that many parts of the nation feel a certain jab in their stomach anytime USC is mentioned. Notre Dame fans can certainly understand the disdain that comes when seeing the cardinal and gold.
What many of you don't understand is that every last Pac-12 fan thinks of USC the way every other American feels about Justin Bieber.
Yeah, it's that bad.
However, the flip side are those few who attended USC or were fortunate enough to jump on the bandwagon as it pulled out of the station.
To them, USC is the epitome of wonderfulness and sweet sports success. You can spot them bumping around Los Angeles, because they are the ones with their noses turned up.
Did you ever get a stain on your favorite sports jersey and it wouldn't come out? After a while you grew accustomed to the sight and would later grow to love it, considering it a sign of your own special and unique wardrobe, no matter how ugly it might look.
That's Mount Davis.
The third-tier section at O.co Coliseum is a steep structure that is hardly easy on the eyes but has become a rather iconic precipice for some fans to hike up to, like Mt. Everest but with more beer.
Alas, the seats may be hidden in the near future as SF Gate reported the Raiders plan to tarp the section for the upcoming season.
Beach Balls and Rain Delays
Let me go ahead and say that I hate beach balls as much as I hate "The Wave." In any other circumstance, standing up in unison or being pelted in the head with a beach ball would be cause for serious agitation.
For some reason this all goes out the window at baseball games. Grown men can be coerced to stand up or run after a beach ball as if it were dipped in gold.
Unfortunately, beach balls have been a reason for game stoppages at baseball games for decades. Now before you East Coasters go ahead and laugh at our ridiculous plight, consider that we are perfectly fine having beach ball stoppages.
It's far better than rain delays, because we hardly have those.
Dodger stadium and Petco Park are two places that have far more minor delays for errant beach balls then they do for awful late spring weather.
Scoff at the few seconds we have to wait for the ball boy to clear away that annoying ball from the field. At least we are dry.
I understand Los Angeles doesn't have an NFL team. You can laugh at me while you also watch your favorite team from the comfort of your home.
The one thing that really sets West Coasters apart is, of course, time.
For NFL games, that means we can roll out of bed and watch the start of a string of NFL games that will end at a reasonable hour.
While you sit and pray that the Sunday Night Game ends early, we are preparing our excuses for work the next day as we head out for a postgame beer.
Allow me to blast my own kind, because they need it.
Every last NL West fan understands there is one fanbase who will come late to games and leave early, and it's Dodger fans.
That leaves thousands with only a few short innings to enjoy their boys in blue before slinking off to the parking lot so they can enjoy some more traffic.
Is a home run a home run if there is nobody there to see it? Well, that theory can be tested roughly every home game up until the third inning.
If you live on the West Coast you may have heard about hockey, but that's about it. Seeing highlights on SportsCenter must be what aliens think if they catch random feeds of "Two and a Half Men."
We are clueless to the rules, the sports' biggest stars and only pay attention when a fight is shown on TV.
Then again, there is a plus side to all of this. Being a hockey fan on the West Coast makes you the biggest hipster in all of sports, which is kind of a big deal on this side of the country.
East Coasters have time on their side in one respect, and that's when it comes to important games that take place on prime time during the week.
While you are shutting down the grill to prepare for Monday Night Football, we are checking the clock and wondering why the hell the boss is still at work.
Slinking off to watch a playoff game or mid-week clash is a time honored tradition that mandates excuses ranging from the harmless "I have to go get the kid from school" to the panic-induced "The kid fell in giant hole and if you don't let me go the 49ers will lose!"
In similar fashion, many on the West Coast have evolved to DVRing their sports games, making live sporting events a luxury they no longer need.
This can backfire.
Now anytime you record a game, you have to make sure you are wearing sports neutral attire lest some random person shouts an unexpected, "Wow, did you watch that game? It was so depressing."
This is why there are random acts of violence.
More than that, you have to have rabbit ears for any small reference to the game you have recorded so you can go into full ear muffs while you run away from your current location.
Sure, it may look ridiculous, but any sports fan in the vicinity will surely understand.
There is a new pastime taking place at ballparks across the NL West, and it's whining about the latest luxury provided by stadiums.
Mobile Sports Report reported four out of five NL West teams will have free Wi-Fi for their fans to enjoy during this season.
It's an amazing and wonderful addition to the sports experience, but I give it a season before fans find reason to whine about speed and lag time.
Setting Sunday Alarm for Fantasy Football
With the stench of beer and bad decisions filling the room, the alarm goes off on Sunday morning giving you one momentary jump start to the day. I have to set my lineups.
Yes, having early NFL games is indeed a treat if you want to enjoy all your football madness during the meat of the day. There is one major downside to that, and that would be setting fantasy football lineups.
There have been many Sunday mornings when I woke up in the first quarter of action only to remember that I forgot to set my all-important roster for the day.
An automatic alarm for 9:45 a.m. every Sunday during football season is as big a necessity as having some pain killers and Gatorade near your bed.
From March Madness to the World Series, there really is nothing like taking in every last moment of a huge sporting event at a Las Vegas sports book.
Yes, I know casinos are nicely peppered around the nation, but there is something comforting in knowing Vegas is just a few short hours away.
Hell, one might get a hankering for Sin City in the third inning of an Angels game, mandating a quick call into work and a very good excuse.
And seriously, I can't stress how wonderful March Madness coverage looks when it's on a wonderful wall of televisions, even if the fog of cigarette smoke hangs just below them.
Sensible Sports Talk Radio
Anytime I get in a cab on the East Coast or listen to streaming radio online, I am surprised at how over-the-top each radio show presents the day's stories.
There are just so many transplants and fans with alternate loyalties that sports radio hosts on the West Coast are far more measured in their approach.
I spent a great deal of time in San Francisco and Los Angeles markets and realized hosts tends to placate callers with sense and reason. Anytime I am on the East Coast it seems hosts are fanning the flames of vitriol.
I could be wrong. Go ahead and shout at me in the comments section below.
Place this one in the awful pile.
The time difference means we on the West Coast have to go through the rigmarole of finding a bar that will open at 4:30 in the morning, so we can watch a good portion of the game until they start serving alcohol around six.
I know. Wanting nothing more than to watch a Chelsea match with a beer in hand at a proper pub caused a grand search for one that might accommodate.
Some of you in the East can close the spot down at four and go back for a party nap and refresh for that major EPL fixture.
Transplants, Transplants Abound Everywhere
Let's treat Raiders fans as the obvious outliers here and say that most fan bases across the Pacific are pretty cool with one another.
Save several awful examples, people are generally kind to one another at each and every stadium, keeping the smack talk to a bare minimum.
I have been to an Angels game rocking enemy gear and sat in AT&T Park with full Dodgers regalia. In both instances, friendly and completely harmless ribbing occurred.
The biggest most loyal fans are lost in a sea of transplants from all over the nation. This makes radio coverage, live games and bar debates all the more lively.
They also contribute to the traffic, so it's a a give and take.
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