Who wouldn't want to be covered in paint? Apparently not Frank Lampard.
Lampard, you see, was left out of Chelsea's photoshoot for next season's kit. But according to the agent of the English midfielder, that has nothing to do with the fact that Lampard's contract is set to expire in the summer.
Nope. It was all about the paint. Rather, not being covered in the stuff.
"I wouldn’t have allowed Frank to take part in any case," agent Steve Kutner said (via Daily Mail). Covering him in paint would have been demeaning."
If you say so, Steve. That story leads this Tuesday edition of the B/R World Football Gossip Roundup, which also includes updates on Wayne Rooney, Thiago Silva and more.
Keep reading for all the paint-covered details.
On-loan Manchester United forward Federico Macheda says his teammate Wayne Rooney will not quit the club this summer, according to Metro.
Rooney, a 27-year-old England international forward, joined United from Everton in 2004. His future has been open to media speculation since he was left on the bench for United's UEFA Champions League Round of 16 second leg against Real Madrid last month.
Paris Saint-Germain are reportedly interested.
Asked whether Rooney would leave Old Trafford this summer, Macheda said: "No, I do not think so. He is an emblem of Manchester United and I think there is no better team in the world than that in which he is playing right now."
Macheda is currently on loan to Stuttgart in the German Bundesliga.
Paris Saint-Germain defender Thiago Silva says he is a Barcelona fan and could play for the club one day (via ESPN FC).
Silva, a 28-year-old Brazil international center-back, joined PSG from AC Milan for a reported €42 million last summer. Silva said he nearly joined Barca last summer but instead honored a promise he previously made to former Milan manager Leonardo, who now serves as PSG's director of football.
There were conversations with my agent, but we had given our word to Leonardo, who I knew from Milan. Once I gave my word, it was difficult to pull back. But you never know what might happen in the future. People dream.
I have always been a Barca fan, since I was a boy, when they had Romario, Rivaldo, Ronaldo... I am their number one fan. After Wednesday I will continue to be. I am happy at the moment at PSG, I hope to keep helping this project.
PSG and Barcelona play Wednesday at the Camp Nou in the second leg of their UEFA Champions League quarterfinal.
Saint-Etienne have turned down Inter Milan's €10 million bid for Gabon international forward Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang, according to Tuttosport (via talkSPORT).
Aubameyang, 23, has scored 17 goals with eight assists in 30 Ligue 1 appearances this season. According to the report, Inter and Saint-Etienne remain in negotiations.
Arsenal and Newcastle are also thought to be interested.
Manchester City striker John Guidetti says he would never play for PSV Eindhoven, according to PA Sport (via Yahoo! Eurosport).
Guidetti, a 20-year-old Sweden international, joined City as a 16-year-old in 2008 but has not made a single senior appearance. Last season he scored 20 goals in 23 games on loan at Feyenoord.
Recent reports have linked Guidetti with a move to Feyenoord's rivals PSV. Guidetti dismissed the rumors.
"In the Netherlands, Feyenoord are the only club I would want to play for," he told Sportwereld AD. "Everyone knows that."
Bayern Munich's sporting director, Matthias Sammer (pictured), says he will challenge French winger Franck Ribery to a push-up contest if Bayern win the UEFA Champions League (Sport Bild via Bavarian Football Works).
The expected relegation of Queens Park Rangers from the Premier League could trigger a series of exits from the club, with French striker Loic Remy a potential £8 million target for several clubs (via The Guardian).
Tottenham Hotspur will use the blood-spinning technique in an attempt to bring back Gareth Bale from injury more quickly (via Daily Mail).
Moroccan midfielder Abdelaziz Barrada says he is ready to leave Getafe (AS via talkSPORT).
Bosnia international midfielder Miralem Pjanic says he is happy to remain with AS Roma despite interest from Manchester City (via talkSPORT).
Cameroon international defender Aurelien Chedjou wants to join Valencia this summer (via talkSPORT).
Ajax defender Toby Alderweireld prefers a move to Liverpool over Newcastle (via ESPN FC).
Liverpool and Marseille will compete for the signing of Sporting Lisbon's £10 million-rated winger Diego Capel (via Daily Mirror).
Arsenal outcast Andrey Arshavin, 32, is considering retirement at the end of the season (via London Evening Standard).