The Introduction of a Lazy, Hypocrite, 'Idiot' Writer: AVR

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The Introduction of a Lazy, Hypocrite, 'Idiot' Writer: AVR
(Photo by Clive Rose/Getty Images)

As our fourth semester is coming to an end , I thought of taking a no holds barred interview of a fellow student's friends.

Just to get an insight of what his friends thought about him.

Well, I did interview three of my batch mates or so called friends of a person.

And that person is Abhimanyu Vinay Rajput.

Well, to begin with,

Abhimanyu Vinay Rajput (as the Institute knows him to be )

or

AVR (as he himself portrays himself on the Internet)

or

Rajput (as his batch mates know him as)

or

Sabu the fouling fanatic monster (as his football mates know him as)

is currently in his fourth semester of a eight semester Bachelor of Technology course at National Institute Of Technology,Rourkela.

Well, it's an Engineering degree and he is on the path of becoming a Metallurgical and Materials Engineer.

So after interviewing his three so called friends I concluded that Abhimanyu Vinay Rajput or AVR or Rajput or Sabu the fouling fanatic monster is a lazy , hypocrite and an 'Idiot' of a writer.

Here are some excerpts of the interview that I have divided to categorize the person himself.

The LAZY PART

Interviewer (INT): Well what is the best quality that Rajput exhibits ?

First Person: He's quite lazy. I learned that trait from him.

Second Person: Yup, that's right , he can cement himself to the bed for hours. I followed him and got nearly flunked in some of the subjects.

INT: But if he's lazy how does he pursue other activities, say like playing football?

Third Person: What , does he do that?

I never heard of him playing football.

INT: But isn't he a part of group of footballers who actually play under the lights in the stadium every evening?

Second Person: Can't say? I have never seen him in shorts though.

Third Person: Or seen him wearing boots.

INT: OK. Let's say about the other activity like He writes for Bleacher Report?

First Person: What? He works for a bleaching company and writes reports on them.

Third Person: Ha! I knew he was somewhat associated with them, look how bright his clothes. I mean the ones he wears.

INT: No, no. Bleacher report is an on-line open source writing website were you write articles about the sport you follow !

Second person: Uh Huh! Well fact of the matter is he doesn't own a PC or a lap top.

INT: So how come he dishes out articles?

First Person: Well using laptops and PC's of his friends.

INT: Has he ever used yours?

Second Person: Never! He is too lazy for that!

INT: So how come he churns out articles and that also from his friends PC's if he is too lazy?

No response .

The HYPOCRITE PART

INT: Well moving on, it's heard that Rajput supports Liverpool FC and...

First Person: What's Liverpool FC ?

INT: Well it's a famous English Club having a fan base around the world.

Third Person: Oh! Yes, I have heard of them. They play for a person named David and are based in Manchester.

Second Person: No! You are quite wrong about the David part, they play for a person named Ferguson and are based in a Park.

I think it's named as Good soon Park. They are the current European Champions.

First Person: Yes, and they also have a player whose won a great award.

INT: Fernando Torres, is it?

First Person: No, it's Ronaldo.

Get your facts straight!

We are Liverpool fans we know that.

Second Person: That's the least we would know about a great club from United States.

INT: But Cristiano Ronaldo is the world player of the year , plays for Manchester United and Liverpool are based in England.

First, second, and third person shout in Unison 'NO!'

First Person: I am talking about Ronaldo the Brazilian who plays for Liverpool and he's won an award called Balloon door.

Second Person: And Americans speak English so it's definitely in United States.

INT: Well, Okay let's talk about Rajput support towards Liverpool?

First Person: Huh ! I have never seen him do that.

INT: But he does!

Third Person: He is too lazy remember , so he is quite lazy to support

INT: How do you know that?

Second Person: That's a fact! How can a man support a Club?

INT: By watching matches and rooting for them to win?

Second Person: Oh! Yes he could do that. I thought of physically supporting a club, well he's not a weightlifter you know.

INT: Well, he is known to stand throughout the match while watching Liverpool play?

Second Person: Because there are no sitting provisions in the Common room!

INT: But your common room has plenty of chairs?

First Person: Afraid that he might not break them and pay a fine!

First, second, and third person laugh in unison.

The IDIOT WRITER PART

INT: Well, let's get back to Bleacher report where Rajput is a scribe...

Third Person: What ?! He is a scribbler!

INT: No, no. It's just a writer ranking.

Second Person: Ah! He scribbles in Bleacher report!

INT: Well, let's forget that shall we?

First Person: How can he become a writer? He is such an idiot. I have heard he always has a book called dictionary or something called the saw us to help him out in words.

INT: But he is well known on B/R .

Third Person: Who won't be when he is scribbling everywhere!

INT: Ah, Well he is known to be an avid reader. Isn't He ?

Second Person: Yea, I heard it from someone that he saves links or something called as pieces which he likes into his FTP.

INT: Wow! Isn't that great that he saves other works.

First person: That means he is not a writer but a reader.

Third person: But what an idiot who saves other peoples work.

Second person: If I read that much I would have become a Bleaching Reporter myself. I also heard that he reads some 20 articles or so in an hour. So he is stealing stuff from other people.

INT: It's Bleacher Report!

Second Person: Yeah, Whatever!

INT: And all his works are quite different from others!

Second Person: No, I mean copy and paste from thousands of writers. And presto, you have a new article.

First Person: That means he is an idiot who is a writer!

INT: Well I think that would be enough. Thanks for sharing your views on him.

Second Person: Oh! Anytime.

First Person: Yes, A friend in need is an enemy indeed.

Third Person: Very well said!


So the conclusion I drew is Abhimanyu Vinay Rajput is a Lazy, Hypocrite, and an 'Idiot' writer.

Firstly, Abhimanyu Vinay Rajput would like to thank his friend for inspiring him to write an article considering the fact that End sems are just round the corner.

Secondly, He would like to state that this piece is a poor attempt towards humor.

Thirdly , He would like to state that this is not a complete biography of himself.

Fourthly , He would like thank B/R ,B/R writers Zahi Sahli , Sarah S , Shyam P , Marie O ,TJ , William Berry , Goutham , Pete , John Louie , T.A. , Ryan , The Destroyer , Todd , Mike , Long John , Daniel Barber , Nan Reddy , Dann Khan , Hao Meng , Sergey Zirkov and the Liverpool FC Community writers Jamie Ward , David Gore , Mike Menace , Barney , Myles , Danny Stewart , Ankit Munjal , Jay Blackburn , Johny Riley and others for opening a new window inside his brains about sports.

He would also like to apologise to B/R Writer Rohini Iyer for his insipid and caustic comments.

Lastly, he doesn't think that writing as a third person is nuts. Just ask Yoosof Farah.

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