The 25 Funniest and Dumbest Nicknames in All of Sports

Jake  Livinston by Correspondent Written on April 06, 2009

Slide 1 of 29

Display_image

Sports teams are associated with their respective nicknames. Some teams have common nicknames such as the Tigers, Bears, Pirates, or Eagles. But some teams have to separate themselves from the rest of the sports world with strange nicknames.

I have compiled a list of the 25 funniest and dumbest nicknames in the world of sports.

Enjoy!

25. Los Angeles Dodgers

GLENDALE, AZ - MARCH 12:  Russell Martin #55 of the Los Angeles Dodgers runs to first base during a Spring Training game against Korea at Camelback Ranch on March 12, 2009 in Glendale, Arizona.  (Photo by Lisa Blumenfeld/Getty Images)

This Major League Baseball team kept its nickname when they moved to the City of the Angels from Brooklyn. So, what is a Dodger?

Apparently, it is someone that dodges train cars. How is that a team nickname?

24. Virginia Tech Hokies

ATLANTA - MARCH 13:  Hank Thorns #10 of the Virginia Tech Hokies dribbles against the North Carolina Tar Heels during day two of the 2009 ACC Men's Basketball Tournament on March 13, 2009 at the Georgia Dome in Atlanta, Georgia.  (Photo by Kevin C. Cox/Ge

Is a Hokie a made up word? I can't find it in the dictionary or anywhere else. I want to know where the people at Virginia Tech came up with this name. When picking a nickname, please choose a real thing next time.

23. Oregon Ducks

SAN DIEGO, CA - DECEMBER 30:   Head Coach Mike Bellotti of the University of Oregon Ducks holds the winner's trophy after beating the Oklahoma State University Cowboys in the Pacific Life Holiday Bowl at Qualcomm Stadium on December 30, 2008 in San Diego,

Yes, their uniforms are unique and pretty cool, but their mascot is not.

A duck is not a ferocious animal and has little association with the state of Oregon. Instead of Ducks, why didn't they choose something common, like Wildcats?

22. St. Bonaventure Bonnies

Display_image

This college clearly named their team after the school name. But instead of the nickname they came up with making sense, their final product was the Bonnies. Isn't that a lady's name? Bad choice, St. Bonaventure.

21. Cal-Irvine Anteaters

Display_image

The anteater is a lousy animal that eats ants. I wouldn't consider it a predator, but UCI chose this to be their mascot.

The actual mascot is ferocious, though. It has a history of fights with other mascots.

20. Great Lakes Loons

Display_image

The Loons are a Minor League baseball team in the Midwest League. They have joined the bandwagon of Minor League teams with strange nicknames (read on for more). I don't exactly know what a loon is and neither do my friends.

Why do teams pick made-up words for their nicknames?

19. Toledo Mud Hens

Display_image

The Mud Hens are another Minor League baseball team and they reside in the International League.

Yes, hens play in mud, but that gives you no reason to pick this as your team's nickname. Yet another case of a team trying to separate themselves from the pack.

18. New Hampshire Fisher Cats

Display_image

The Fisher Cats are a Minor League baseball team. They clearly can't put two and two together when determining a nickname for the team.

Cats don't fish, they are afraid of water. Therefore, the nickname makes no sense.

17. Miami Hooters

Display_image

This defunct AFL team must like the famous restaurant and modeling service...or they like owls. Their logo is a combination of the two, with an owl in the background an the Hooters restaurant writing above.

If they meant for the "hooter" to be an owl, they should've named the team "the Owls." Now people think that they named it after the restaurant, and that's strange.

16. Tennessee-Chattanooga Mocs

PHILADELPHIA - MARCH 19:  Kevin Goffney #33 of the Chattanooga Mocs reacts during the first round of the NCAA Division I Men's Basketball Tournament against the Connecticut Huskies at the Wachovia Center on March 19, 2009 in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.  (

The Mocs entered the national spotlight in March with a berth in the NCAA tournament as a 16 seed, though they were crushed by Connecticut.

I know what mocking is, but a moc? Is that short for a moccasin? It remains a mystery and their silly nickname made my list.

15. Utah Jazz

TARRYTOWN, NY - JULY 29:  Kosta Koufos of the Utah Jazz  poses for a portrait during the 2008 NBA Rookie Photo Shoot on July 29, 2008 at the MSG Training Facility in Tarrytown, New York.  NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downl

Back when this franchise was stationed in New Orleans, this nickname was suitable. But now in Salt Lake City, Utah, I don't even know if there is a jazz station in the city. It would be a sensible nickname, but jazz is not common in Utah.

14. Lubbock Cotton Kings

Display_image

This Minor League hockey team in the Central Hockey League are the kings of the cotton- whatever that means.
Being a cotton king doesn't make much, if any, sense. They may pick cotton or may be kings, but those two words don't mix.

Let's call them the Lubbock Kings to keep it simple.

13. Anaheim Mighty Ducks

ANAHEIM, CA - MARCH 15:  Bobby Ryan #9 of the Anaheim Ducks reacts after missing a scoring chance on a shot from the middle slot in the third period during the NHL game against the San Jose Sharks at Honda Center on March 15, 2009 in Anaheim, California.

This is another case of the duck syndrome, but worse. DUCKS ARE NOT MIGHTY!

This NHL franchise clearly has their animals mixed up. Tigers are mighty, not ducks.

12. Modesto Nuts

Display_image

Nuts are for eating, not for baseball team nicknames. Apparently, this California League Minor League baseball team didn't get that memo.

The only things nuts and baseball have in common are that you see them at the ballpark and you crush them.

11. Anaheim Amigos

Display_image

The Anaheim Amigos were a former American Basketball Association basketball team. They must have been very good friends.

Amigo is Spanish for "friend," not Spanish for "good nickname." The amigo is not a good nickname, but it is a good person.

10. Mary Baldwin College Fighting Squirrels

Display_image

Isn't this the nickname of the team in a cell phone commercial (for Cingular?)? They picked that name so people would remember the commercial, but this team picked because they though it was intimidating.

This Virginia college must see squirrels as fighters. Squirrels are the animals that run away from humans and eat nuts (not the baseball team). They don't fight.

9. Hamilton Tiger-Cats

TORONTO - NOVEMBER 25:  Jeremy O'Day #54 of the Saskatchewan Rough Riders hoists the Grey Cup with fans in celebration of a 23-19 victory over the Winnipeg Blue Bombers during the 95th Grey Cup on November 25, 2007 at the Rogers Centre in Toronto, Ontario

I couldn't find the Tiger-Cats logo, so I went with a CFL team holding up the Grey Cup Trophy.

Honestly, we understand that a tiger is a cat, but adding cat makes the name un-ferocious. It also makes the name partially nonsensical and strange.

8. Syracuse Salty Dogs

Display_image

A salty dog is fairly explanatory; a dog that's salty, not a nickname. I don't understand why this United States Soccer A-League team decided that dogs are salty, but their decision is funny and dumb.
Choosing a dog is fine, but one that is salty is completely crazy.

8. North Carolina Tar Heels

DETROIT - APRIL 04:  (R-L) Tyler Hansbrough #50, Ty Lawson #5, Deon Thompson #21, Wayne Ellington #22 and Danny Green #14 of the North Carolina Tar Heels huddle while taking on the Villanova Wildcats during the National Semifinal game of the NCAA Division

They may be playing for the National Championship, but their nickname is strange. A tar heel is one of the strangest and dumbest nicknames in all of college sports.

We know what a tar heel is—a heel with tar on it—but why it was chosen as UNC's nickname is unknown. If you are coming up with a team name, don't choose any body parts, as North Carolina did.

7. Ohio Weslayan Battling Bishops

Display_image

This one made the list for an obvious reason: BISHOPS DON'T BATTLE.

Bishops are figures of the church, Godly people. Choosing the bishop would make sense, though it would be different, but adding the word "Battling" in front makes the nickname dumb but funny.

6. Webster College Gorlocks

Display_image

A gorlock is, according to the school, a mythical creature that flies...and a fairly long explanation. Nobody knows what a gorlock is, except for that it sounds like it's from a Harry Potter book. This is another made-up word.

How did the fine people at Webster University let the gorlock become its mascot?

5. Macon Whoopee

Display_image

The Whoopee, a Minor League hockey team in the East Coast Hockey League, is another case of a made-up word for a nickname. They could be the Whoop or the Whoopers, but the Whoopee? Come on, now.
Not only is this a made-up word, but it's a crazy made-up word.

4. Whittier College Poets

Display_image

This is no joke- the poet is actually Whittier College's mascot and nickname. Choosing the poet to be your school symbol is just wrong and crazy. I can just picture the chant to break the team huddle after a time out:

"Who are we?" The team captain says.
"Poets!" It grows quiet and an awkward silence grows.
"Are you serious? We're F-ing Poets?" He asks
"Dang, man. You're right. We're F-ing Poets!" They say.

This one is so dumb that it's really funny.

3. Lehigh Valley Iron Pigs

Display_image

You would probably think that this is a football team, but guess again.

The Iron Pigs are a Minor League baseball team (what a surprise!) in the International League.

This nickname is really funny and dumb and that is why it is near the very top of the list. Pigs are sloppy creatures that lie around all day. Apparently, they are iron!

I can visualize the new hit comic book hero—the Iron Pig!

2. Montgomery Biscuits

Display_image

Does it surprise you that the Biscuits are a Minor League baseball team? It shouldn't, seeing how most strange nicknames are from this area of sports.

I don't know how in anyone's right mind they would come up with the biscuit as their mascot. Biscuits are good, but as a team nickname?

Not so hot (or buttery).

1. Everett Aqua Sox

Display_image

The nickname that tops this list is that of the Everett Aqua Sox.

The Aqua Sox are (no surprise) a Minor League baseball team in the Northwest League.

People have made fun of the Red and White Sox, but Aqua Sox is way over the line.

There is no such thing as an aqua sock (unless you stepped in a puddle). Putting a frog on the logo has no relevancy and the nickname is absolutely dumb.

But it's so dumb that it is hysterically funny
In fact, it's so out-of-this-world-dumb that I must applaud the mastermind behind this nickname.

Other Suggestions

Display_image

This list does not include high school nicknames, but if your high school had a strange nickname, tell us!
I'm sure plenty of people on B/R know more funny nicknames that I didn't mention, so share!

I hope you enjoyed The 25 Funniest and Dumbest Nicknames in All of Sports.

(0)
...
Share This  
Crop_45x45
or to post this comment

18 Comments

There are no comments yet. Get the conversation started by leaving the first comment

Loading more comments...
posted just now
  • Loading...
  • Nobody has liked this comment yet
Cancel

This comment and all replies have been deleted This comment has been deleted Undo delete

748
reads

18
comments

written on April 06, 2009 Humor


CBS Sports Official Partner
Certain photos copyright © 2009 by Getty Images.
Any commercial use or distribution without the express written consent of Getty Images is strictly prohibited.