Hey, you know what your Super Bowl party was missing? It was missing Takeru Kobayashi eating one whole pizza in a minute.
I understand you may have stuffed your fat face with your fair share of pizza and beer on Sunday, but the fact that you didn't see someone else do that means you had a horrible Super Bowl.
No, no, no, there is no argument there. Please remedy all of that by taking a gander at a video spotted by Deadspin, featuring professional eater Kobayashi going H.A.M. on a pizza.
Note there is some NSFW language, as one party reveller can't contain his excitement.
The initial report from Deadspin stated that this video was taken from a Super Bowl party which featured the famed eater taking down a whole pie in a minute—a celebrity cameo that cost $1,500.
Well, an update to that report issues that the cost of having Kobayashi at your party is actually $3,250, causing me to consider a career in dropping by parties and eating their pizza.
These party bros got their money's worth, because they even engaged in one of the more awkward chugging contests we have seen (some NSFW language).
You may still have some indigestion from overeating on those wings Sunday night, which makes the idea of watching someone else stuff their face with obscene amounts of food far more inviting of an idea.
Just when you thought your Super Bowl party was the noise, you spot video of this soiree featuring a legend in gut-busting heroics.
Hit me up on Twitter for more side-splitting fun.
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